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Tuesday, May 02, 2006

shallow hal

All right, I will preface the next five minutes of typing with the following statement: I'm about to be shallow. Very, very shallow. Shallowed be my name. The one remaining remark before making this explanation is that I'm allowed to make such shallow remarks because I used to be an English teacher. That's the closest I'm going to come to an excuse of any kind.

Yes, truth be told, I notice grammar. I notice spelling and punctuation...I notice whether someone overuses "quotation marks" or doesn't capitalize even the most proper of proper nouns like the united states of america. (((Chris and Caleb: Ah ha! YOU are my true editors:))). I notice whether or not a sentence is connected with a comma and a conjunction. I see the beauty of verbs, and - glory, glory! - I so appreciate the use of a semi-colon in connecting two parts of a sentence.

With that said, today I got an email from a cute boy, but despite the content, this was all I saw: ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! He was Mr. Exclamation Point himself. I'm sure the content of his email was great...but all I saw and all I remember is exclamation point overuse. Whatever happened to just a good old period? Might you connect a sentence with a thrilling semi-colon? Whatever happened to a dash in the middle of a sentence - just to spice things up a bit. But no. No! I mean yes! I mean, a boy wrote me an email! I should be excited! But all I can do is criticize his lack of punctuation creativity!

What is my problem? And could it be that he's just excited to write to me, and has no other outlet of expressing his heartfelt emotion?! (Oh the double "?!" - you know it's a strong thought then!).

I know...I've got issues...but I just had to get it out. I'll let ya'll know if Mr. Exclamation Point strikes again.

5 comments:

TREEMAN said...

hahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fabulously done my gramatically obssessed friend. Personally I go into writing knowing i'm an awful speller, though do try to use creative puncuation and sentace structure. What's fun is throwing in commas and semicolons; in the wrong spots. That really spices stuff up i find. as well as not capitalizing first words of sentances or the word "I". Haha, but that's just me.

What i do find wildly amusing is the fact that in a blog ranting about gramer and punctuation I find a grammer error in the second paragraph and a puncuation error in the last. "capitalize" perhaps and it's you+all= y'all. hahaha, cheers! my anal retentive friend!

caramac said...

Caleb: all right, so you know I now had to look this up...if you're talking about the U.S. of A. non-capitalization, that was because, well, the sentence was about not capitalizing proper nouns. It was a funny in my own not-so-funny sort of way. But man, the ya'll vs. y'all really threw me for a loop!!! Of course in my geekiness I looked it up, and "ya'll" has to do with inclusiveness, while y'all has to do with groups as a whole. Cheers back to you. Glad to see you in blogger world. :)

TREEMAN said...

wow, you are hella smart! I am humbled by your scholarly skillz.... i still think capitilization sounds funny.... :D

Gibbytron said...

!!!!!! (um, sorry, just being annoying!! :)

Mike said...

I don't think you are shallow. A grammar snob, but not shallow.

Maybe you should let your mom pick your boyfriends. She has good taste.