living. loving. laughing.

living.  loving.  laughing.

Friday, April 27, 2007

true or false....again

A dog will return to his vomit.


Mr. Darcy, you sick, sick dog you.....stop thinking you're a cow! Dogs can't digest grass - eghlgh (pretend that's a sickening sound).

Monday, April 23, 2007

APA - not the writing style

On friday and saturday a bunch of us gathered together to celebrate aaron and annie's* wedding. i was honored to plunk on the piano keys for the march annie down the aisle (well, via the grand) have the piano sit on the side that looked into aaron's face...and to then play and be in sync with bethany, his sister who sang a breath-STOPPING italian aria and the Lord's Prayer. ...i think i now love opera, by the way.

and on my way there i realized how PARALYZING fear is for it stops me. it stops my fingers from playing and clams them up and makes me lose my place, and really, no matter how damn easy the sheet music is, when my heart is beating like a big, bad drum, fear physically takes over. So on my way there on saturday, in my polka dot brown dress ( :: hot :: ), I just started to talking to jesus about how silly this whole fear thing is, because really, that's what it is: silliness. I KNOW the music...and it's only when over-thinking creates these stories of silly in my mind that I start shakin' in my boots (or in my Nina heels, to be so shoe-correct). And I think that sometimes when you realize the silliness it just makes you giggle, and giggling then eases the pain that fear falsely paints, and then playing a little recessional is really no big deal.

So in realizing fear...maybe like our friends in AA, that's the first step. And I want to get out of this paralysis, but sometimes my little wheelchair of a comfort level has just been used for so long that I really don't know any other way. Without taking this analogy any further than it's already gone, your thoughts on getting up and RUNNING?!


*aaron and annie: they're maybe the nicest people in america. aaron's been a buddy since the 6th grade when we were safety town instructors ["red means means go...yellow means wait, even if you're late!" wha, wha, whaaaa]. i think one of my FAVORITE aaron memories is when, with his family, we crashed miss america's wedding one summer... though i've tried to set aaron up with all of my RNFs (really nice friends), he finally found his catch, his lady, his annie....and she is SO good for him! And she's really, really cool, and we've started adding to our repetoire red wine and boys talks - so with both of these lovelies, I wish them the very best. and way to drive off from the wedding in a fire truck. that's uber cool in my book.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

i have decided....

to follow jesus?

check. No, no, no...I have decided that life's too short to read really lame books. Now there are always exceptions to the rule, but this is what I realized on Friday: if I buy a book on clearance...and it's not a classic and/or a "favorite" recommendation of someone's....AND it's really lame, and I just don't like it, then it goes in the Goodwill pile. (((And otherwise, I chalk it up to "it's just not my time to read it yet", and I try again in a couple of years))). But there are SO many good books to read, so why get stuck reading a lame-o one that you don't like? (Cara's perfectionism then comes out :: what we* start, we must finish).

On another note, this weekend I went down to Oregon and realized the following:

1. I'm not a professional piano accompanist, as much as I'd like to think I am. :) Bethany, forgive me, for I know not how I play...

2. Friends whom you've known for 17 years DON'T come and go, but those treehouse sleepovers you had as kids create fabulous memories when it comes to bridal showers. Congrats, Sarah Signe.

3. Sometimes it puts a smile on your face reuniting with your 8th grade boyfriend at your parents' choir cantata, especially when his name is Ted, and you used to write him notes addressed to "teddy bear," and he then wrote back to "care bear." Ahhh....mouth puke, ugh, ugh.

*me, myself and I :: you know it.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

this post is dedicated to the peeps who always post pictures of their's my version:

Five pictures are worth a thousand pennies....

my friend mary beth and I decided to drink the can of Guinness that had been in the back of her fridge for over a year one night - sorry Murrow, we only lasted about 2 sips.

I love Bruce and Mr. Darcy!

while we were at Whidbey Island, walking on the beach, Bruce decided to trail behind me, hiding from MD as much as possible.

yes. This is bonafide proof that we really did hop on a plane to AZ: Copey and Lizzy - what fabulous vacationers you are!

Then, while sitting in the Phoenix airport, I replaced Erik with a K with Eric with a C: here's my new friend on Easter Sunday. Some people hunt for eggs. I apparently hunt for new friends in airports.

Friday, April 06, 2007

an intersection of souls

Tonite we did a wyldlife field trip of sorts, and we went to this thing called JOURNEY at Grace (Community Church), and then to DQ afterwards. A couple of the boys came solely for the free Dairy Queen I promised them, but hey, you take what you can get. Meanwhile, the JOURNEY was one of those real-live Jerusalem/life of Jesus/significance of the cross reinactments with marketplace times interspursed throughout the loooooooong intermissions. (And I got to haggle and bargain and barter like my Tijiana-hassler self likes to do....though they definitely had a set price of how low-they-could-go...).

And in part III, as I sat next to Kevin, an 8th grader, I came face to face with experiencing the cross of Christ all over for the first time. Here were some of his comments:

What the heck?

Is this how he got hung?

Man! This is messed up!

Man! This is jacked up!

No! Crucify them! (he shouted back to the Sanhedrin).

So that's how Jesus died?


That's not fair!

And as he started to ask a question about what all this talk about SIN was all about, I also began noticing the woman sitting in front of me. She had slowly morphed from one of annoyance and anger at the 14 year old sitting behind her, to one of weeping and sadness and maybe gladness too. And instead of turning around to glare at Kevin again or to shush him, with tears streaming down her face, she began to explain to Kevin what that sin WAS all about...and she talked about how Jesus had to do that in order that we might have eternal life.

I sat there wondering how, in middle school language I could dissect her big Christian words, but then I realized that that wasn't the point...and that in that very moment, I knew the woman had met Jesus again...and I had seen Jesus again...and Kevin was seeing Jesus for the first time. And it was beautiful.

May we remember who and what and why we celebrate this Easter season. blessings, chm.