There is an industry out there known as the BIG DAY. I'm 9 days into the world of engagement and already it's like the wedding world dropped an a-bomb on the front door of my cottage. james and i are committed to the following wedding mantra: stress-free, fun, about the two of us and life together and marriage preparation - and not the $100,000 wedding.
We met on Sunday for our first official "not calling it a meeting marriage preparation" day ... in other words, we met to plan a wedding (shhh! don't tell him I said those words!). I arranged it much like I would if I were preparing talks for a weekend at camp: 1) get a stack of recycled paper (because I'm eco-savvy). 2) at the top of each page, write a different theme; for instance, "DREAMS," "do's", "don'ts", "setting," "pastor," "FINANCIALS" (ack!), etc. The "do's" were not then about the vows, but about what we've seen in other weddings that we like.
So, on the do's list:
*Marvin Gaye (J)
*a weekend of festivities (C)
*no line dancing (J) - bummer! ;)
*no Ephesians 5 (C)
And the list goes on...I suppose this is why you're supposed to buy a wedding planning book, but I haven't gotten that far and am okay with it.
In the meantime, I'm still in DREAM phase - and in "how to have a lovely, inexpensive, fabulous, posh" wedding phase as well. Here are some ideas thus far:
*flowers: go to the farmer's market the morning of. Done.
*centerpieces: put said flowers in mason jars. fill with water.
*DJ: honor a friend who's good at music and on a mic, and hand him/her an ipod and the microphone.
*Hair: cross your fingers that a favorite friend/hairdresser will cut you a deal and still make you look pretty since she's coming to the wedding anyway.
*Photography: muy importante. Spend money here. Also beg friends who are good at photography to bring their cameras along and take one billion pictures.
*Venue: Cross your fingers, smile pretty and pray for a venue that's free and that we can fit a big white tent into the backyard of!
*Tables and chairs: see if churches I have a relationship with (through YL) will offer us a few ... or BYOC! I've heard of that - bring your own chair!
*Dessert: 1) BYOD - for all the little old ladies who want to participate, have them bring in a dessert! Potluck dessert at a wedding - yum! (Note: there would only be one "BYO-_______"). 2) Do a nice 6-inch cake for the bride/groom, and then do a cheaper mass production cake for the rest of the peeps. 3) Hire Jenn Lopez to make hoards of cupcakes.
*Food: MUY IMPORTANTE - we want this day to be a gift to everyone involved, so if they're showing up, they're eating! We'd like to do a SOUTHERN meal in honor of James' heritage: fried catfish, hush puppies, cornbread and greens, anyone? next question: does anyone know of a cheap but good private caterer who'd like to cater our wedding with such food?
*Drink: yes. Hopefully we'll be able to have a location in which we can bring in our own beer/wine.
*Date: WE DON'T HAVE ONE, FOLKS. I know that with summer vacations and such, inquiring minds want to know - but we don't know yet. I'll say it's our goal by April 15th - how 'bout that?
*Special friends, bridesmaids, flower girls, etc - still deciding how to honor dear friends.
*Wedding planner: it's me, it's me! DREAM BIG and have monthly crafting parties. :)
I'm glad for websites like this one here and that one there that give me hope...and now, stress-free, let that be me!