live. love. laugh.

launching...

2011-07-20T19:26:00.001-07:00

www.carameredith.com

Check it out! I figured since it's been almost a YEAR of marriage (and subsequent name change), it's about time to switch on over to a new blog. I'm also using it to launch speaking and writing, eventually that is...

xoxo, and switch on over to the new blog!

oakbridge.

2011-06-20T13:36:00.000-07:00

after a week of camp with middle school friends...

hearts on the cross, next to the gift. one week down, three to go.

1 2 3 4 5

2011-06-19T21:10:00.000-07:00

To tell you the truth, I'm not even sure what day it is. I'm in that land called Young Life assignment land, where dates and days of the week are lost, and we just end up referring to days as "day 1," "day 2," "day 3," and so on and so forth. I have the privilege of spending four weeks in San Diego county (um, yes, that's a great thing), speaking to middle school kids about this godman, Jesus. So with one week down and under our belts, we're getting ready for the next crew of kids to arrive tomorrow.

And what day is it again?

Though I wish I had better stories to tell from my day off, this I know is true:

1. I just finished 8 hours of Fuller coursework for a spring class, and was EAGER to turn it in one day early. Today's workload included a 6-page book comparison paper and a three-hour test. I write this not for pity, but simply because it's the ONLY thing my brain's been thinking about since 1 o'clock this afternoon!

2. Have I mentioned that I love middle school kids, with all their awkward and preciousness? It's official, I do, I do, and this past week was no exception.

3. Our assign team is AWESOME; for instance, one of my suite-mates, Joey, just came in and brought me hot chocolate. Because he's that nice.

4. James arrives on TUESDAY - yippee!!! He'll be here for two full weeks, and both of us are beyond delighted at our luck. He gets a two-week vacation, and I get him here on camp turf with me. Delighted.

5. I'm especially excited because of the many stories I tell about him, and I know he's going to become a superstar to the little 5-foot buggers. Stoked about that.

And that, my friends, is a night in the life of one such Mrs. Meredith.

Until next time, blogger-land.

hipstamatic and instagram

2011-05-30T18:48:00.000-07:00

1. I have fully become that person who doesn't just refer to her cell phone as such, but as the (...wait for it, wait for it...) iphone. I do love my iphone, and fast-forwarding a bit, I love the picture apps on it; hipstamatic and instagram are two of my favorites, with a couple of fave pictures here:

This was on a random wall on a random street down in San Diego; I head down there in a couple of weeks again for assignment with Young Life - that means that, as YL staff, we staff their camps for the summer. I'll be at a camp called Oakbridge, speaking to middle school kids for four weeks; James will join me for half the time, and will hold down fort as the speaker's husband. He's excited too. :) But as per the picture, the coloring tinted it to what I'd deem San Diego coloring - a little hippie-esque and muted.

This one isn't 540 miles away (ie: San Diego...), but instead just about 15 feet from where I'm sitting. I love the vase, with all its funkiness and perfect, brightened green color against the stark white background. And, of course, I love the picture that family printed up for us - with all its funkiness and perfection from our wedding day as well. :)

This picture was right before a perfect, organic, yummy dinner in the city...and the tinting on the photo reminds me of one I'd find in a 1970's photo album on that same corner street. Love it.

This was a fun night for "work" called Couch Life, ie: drive couches in trucks around the city of San Mateo in a scavenger-like fashion. As per the picture, it again has that 70's/San Diego look, but I also like, that while the couch was planted on the front lawn, the couch (and cute YL girl, Lyddie) are part of the picture, but not the entire focus. They're kind of a fun, main accessory.

My parents were in town last weekend, and what fun we had doing the everyday - including taking BART into the city for a visit to James' office, lunch, and ice cream at Bi-Rite Creamery. (Snickerdoodle ice cream, um, yum!). As per the picture, the natural orange-y tint brings excitement to an otherwise dreary public transportation experience.

I do love these pics - and using fun mediums only adds to their fun!

ahem.

2011-05-23T17:41:00.000-07:00

It has recently come to my attention that if I were to stop eating the following, I would probably lose 47 pounds or so:

Now this wasn't because some random passerby or ~~rude~~ very truthful friend pointed out my love of cheese, but no - I simply took stock of our refrigerator and noticed that about 25% of it could be found in your local grocer's dairy section.

I could be exaggerating.

I am exaggerating.

But as I just sat here eating a snack of crackers with goat cheese and cherry tomatoes, such a realization was had:

It's still true, two wasted paragraphs later. [Wasted, as in the space on this blog site, not as in the vino I should be drinking with said goat cheese topped-crackers.]

My parents - Dan and Noel - were in town this past weekend; hoping on Saturday to trek up to Sausalito, to see old family houses, the famous liquor store that they met in (no joke), and honk at the hospital yours truly was born in, our plans were quickly thwarted by every other Bay Area resident hoping to stake their claim in Marin county that day as well. [Or at the rivaling Giants-A's game, I'm not sure...]

So what to then do with a couple who grew up in the area, who doesn't then need to see Fisherman's Wharf, and isn't about to trek to the top of Montara Mountain? (My favorite viewpoint hike, by the way).

Harley Farms Goat Dairy, of course!

We took the 1 down from San Francisco to Pescadero, a quaint little farming town south of Half Moon Bay. I'd learned about the goat farm when James and I were engaged; enthralled with the idea of getting married in a barn, I began researching barns in the area, of which Harley Farms has an - albeit small - one for hosting monthly organic dinners and small celebrations. (Any of you want to go in for one of the monthly dinners? Two words: Goat Cheese. Third word: Yum).

Anyways, we got there, and immediately smelled these:

(All photos courtesy of Harley Dairy Goat Farms).

And then tried to get a couple of these little mini buggers to chat with us, but they ran into their little goat-house and hid...

But we then succeeded in eating said favored fromage, including all of these ones here:

It put Costco's free samples to shame, that's all I have to say. Who needs lunch when you've got hoards of goat cheese to sample? And olive oil. And honey. And more cheese.

Needless to say, I loved our little jaunt out of the hustle and bustle of the Peninsula to the heartland of the coastal farming community. As I prepare to make grilled cheese and tomato soup for dinner, go book yourself a tour at the goat farm.

You can thank me later.

sometimes...

2011-05-16T22:21:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I sit down in front of the computer, and don't have a plan for what I'm going to write - but I assume that if I want to someday be that Anne Lamott-Annie Dillard-Fredrick Buechner woman of a Cara-writer, I'd better start. And that writing ...something...is better than writing nothing at all.

This weekend James and I just RESTED - and it was glorious. Oh, to sleep in two mornings in a row without setting the alarm :: now that is just pure bliss! (All of you parents out there, I know, I need to shut my yapper, but I'll glory in the sleep in for now). We ended up watching 3 movies in 3 nights:

Night 1: BRIDESMAIDS. Heel-arious. I so highly recommend this flick especially if you've ever a) been in a wedding, b) been a female, c) been a male because it's still funny to all humankind, d) had a love affair with Wilson Philips and yearned to be the 4th woman in the band. Upon originally seeing previews, I thought it was going to be one of those chick-flick, 25% critic ratings, but no, friends - this movie got a 92% critic review on Rotten Tomatoes!

Night 2: LETTERS TO JULIET. You'd think that if we watched a highly-rated movie night one, we'd continue the trend: not so much. But I can say this, after a day of sleeping in (ahem), eating yummy cornmeal waffles, reading the morning away, hiking, shopping and just being together, it was the perfect end to our evening. Paired with pizza on the grill and a bottle of wine, our little Juliet (of Shakespeare persuasion) never looked so good!

Night 3: THE BLACK SWAN. One thought: I will never pick my cuticles again, swear to God. (Yes, incredible movie with amazing special effects and highly disfunctional people - which generally make for excellent films - but I'm just glad we watched it a) together, and b) while the sun was still peeking its way through).

---

Otherwise, Mondays make me think of Whole Foods because that's where I usually eat dinner after a work out and before Young Life - which makes me think of sushi because that's what I generally eat most Mondays ... which makes me think of our lovely James and Cara sushi birthday party a couple months back:

and...

Fun times with cousin Kaitlin and friend Lily above - redheads unite! ...Which makes me think of Nevada City and good times with family out there, like this one of the two loves of my life:

and...

So it is here that we come to an end. Random, but altogether accomplished, I'd say. xoxo, c.

a things I love list today.

2011-05-09T22:32:00.000-07:00

1. the apple store. I'll be honest: I'm a total sucker for all that apple puts out. I admit that I fully buy in to their promos that somehow I'll end up being that altogether uber cool nerd; I don't know if I've quite been successful in it yet, but I still show up wanting and desiring to be a part of the mac community.

2. The Body Shop. I recently bought a $45 Body Shop groupon for $20 - it just makes you feel healthy and organic, and REALLY, if marketers were reading this right now, they'd label me SUCKER for positive advertising campaigns. (ps: PLEASE tell me you're aware of Groupon and Living Social...and if you're not, run to their website right now for steal of a deals!)

3. Macy's Home Section. I've grown up. I covet peacock blue Fiestaware and grass green Kitchenaid Mixers and other gadgets that will somehow make me want to be in the kitchen more. And God forbid, it's worked. What's next?

Can you tell that I had meetings and errands to run today at the mall?

Boo!

4. a good glass of wine. I don't even mind that it came from a screwtop.

5. Substituting various non-semi-sweet chocolate chips, cranberries, raisins and trail mix for 12 ounces of (said) semi-sweet chocolate chips to make some AMAZING cookies. Not that James ate 5 of them this evening or anything. Not that I counted.

6. When Young Life leaders care more about kids hurting than a program. That I love.

7. My husband. Neighbor Mark recently described him "...without a mean bone in his body. Why is he so nice?!" He asked. "And how does he put up with your sassiness?" The nerve!

8. Books on tape. Actually, they're totally not on tape - but I LOVE listening to so-called books on tape channeled through Audible.com on my iphone. The elliptical at the gym never tasted so good! Current reads: LOVE WINS (Bell - I'd love to dialogue that with some of you. Let me know if you're reading it), and THE INHERITANCE OF LOSS (Desai).

9. Speaking of the gym: the classes. My goal is two a week. At this point, Zumba and Spin have clearly come ahead as the winners - seriously, who knew shaking my booty and working my booty could be this much fun?

10. Mr. D. You know I couldn't end a post without mentioning the little bugger. I tell you, there is nothing better than a slightly neurotic dog absolutely overjoyed at seeing his human mama. I'm like, I will walk through that door 15 times if you're going to make me feel this way!

What do you love today?

a neighborhood easter.

2011-04-27T20:59:00.000-07:00

This year's Easter celebration was birthed over the Chuck-it. You see, most every morning is marked by our neighborhood's own version of a dog park: Mark and Ruckus, Erin and Lilly, Kara and her girls, Cara and Mr. Darcy, Mona and Simba, & Loren and Mochi might be out on the green throwing and catching the balls. Our eclectic little neighborhood has been brought together by our canine friends.

Our mornings together are real and messy and encouraging and perplexing all at the same time. Yet conversations happen in the midst of it, and neighbors have turned into acquaintances, and then to friends and might I say ... dear friends. But it's a pretty cool picture of real life, because we're not all alike - for instance, each couple seems to have been dubbed some sort of label. Though individually James is "the hot one," and I'm "the good one" [oh, how I've vied for the label of "the hot one!"], collectively we've been labeled "The Christians."

It was over a canine conversation that we began talking about doing a neighborhood Easter celebration, and happen it did. Together, 18 Christians and non-Christians and Jews and gays and lesbians and straights and friends of friends gathered for a potluck Easter "slupper" (supper + lunch, of course), complete with an Elton John and Sound of Music sing-a-long at the end of the afternoon.

It was altogether lovely. And, quite frankly, I think the way it's supposed to be.

Jeannie and Mark, chatting it up.

Time for dessert! Cinnamon rolls by James, carrot cake by Jeannie, Fruit tart by Kara (upstairs neighbor and namesake), and an apple turnover. Yummy!

Upstairs neighbors Earl and Kara - the former of whom I think must be Jude Law's brother.

Conversations over books, starring the former English teacher, the man who reads a lot, and the English professor and author - what great neighbors for this girl to have!

And finally, the Elton John and Sound of Music jam session - if only you could have seen Mr. Meredith singing along!

The Easter celebration continues, all year long... He is risen - he is risen, indeed!

today was a big day...

2011-04-18T23:02:00.000-07:00

Today was a big day:
I bought a coupon organizer.

Today was a big day:
I reorganized clipped coupons into my own little sections instead of the boring old
alphabetization and/or month's expiration. So instead we have some of the following
categories: "carbs," "dog," "toiletries," and of course, good old "random."

Today was a big day:
I read four chapters for an upcoming Fuller class - do violence and hospitality go together
when talking about Jesus' death on the cross? that is the question.

Today was a big day:
I didn't pick up book 3 of teenage vampire smut, not even once.

Today was a big day:
I baked 4 dozen triple chocolate cranberry oatmeal cookies, and only ate ONE of them (okay,
and some dough. And then some more).

Today was a big day:
Mr. Darcy had two really good sweaty workouts, and I had two really good sweaty workouts.

Today was a big day:
I told a girl at Young Life that if she could get seven of her friends who'd never been to
YL to camp this summer that she'd go for free. I might bite our area's campership
resources in the butt, but I think it's a good incentive for this future marketing major.

So really, was today a big day? Not really - it was actually altogether quite normal - but I suppose that if we're to live each day to the fullest, then we're going to look for those "big" things in the midst of the little.

What was big about your day?

the up-to's

2011-04-15T17:26:00.000-07:00

What have we been up to lately?

...speaking at two different Young Life banquets in our region and loving it. I've also worn the same outfit both times - shhh, don't tell.

...then not sleeping super well because my mind is racing from speaking at said banquets so I then attempt to remember to take my melatonin and have a cup of camomile every night before bed.

but what happens is that my mind turns on super-speed, and I can't slow it down. I'm excited and exhausted and replaying and reviewing my words and motions and actions all at the time, and it's RIDICULOUS that sleep suffers as a result of it! And yet I feel so ALIVE in the midst of it...do any of you have this problem? What do you do? How do you calm down and go to beddy-by?

Because otherwise what happens is that I find myself waking up at 2 in the morning, making another cup of camomile and reading smutty brainless "literature" like this:

I mean, really people, this has to stop! There are SO many better books to be reading in the wee hours of the night than those about Sookie Stackhouse (which I can't even call real literature, so much so that I have to put it in quotes).

So, we are hopin' and a prayin' for some SLEEP for this sleep-deprived lady so that she can at least come up with better blogposts than that of insomnia.

xoxo, cara "I love vampires at 2:12 in the morning" meredith

i'll admit...

2011-04-07T22:45:00.000-07:00

I'm pretty excited for these to come in the mail:

I'll admit...

I've been listening to CIRCUS MUSIC lately, and am stoked for this coming Monday's circus-themed YL banquet. Who knew?

I'll admit...

I've actually been having a whole lotta fun in the kitchen lately.

I'll admit...

It's hard when the hubs works long hours.

I'll admit...

I wish I only required five hours of sleep - but the but of it is that I really, really like my bed.

I'll admit...

I'm excited to get into being a life coach for high school kids. Eventually. (But I am starting a certification program in the coming months).

I'll admit...

I desire to see life half-full, even when it seems like there's nothing but rain POURING all around you, if you know what I mean.

I'll admit...

Even though the waiting process is hard, there's fruit in the midst of it, and fruit to come.

Waiting, waiting.

once upon a mississippi...

2011-04-04T21:11:00.000-07:00

Once upon a Mississippi there was an Uncle James and an Aunt Cara who flew back to the man-boy's homeland to see the relations. And see the relations they did, namely in the four "j's": Janae, Jaylah, Jameria and little baby James. [Okay, let's be honest, there were three more "j's" to add to the mix: James senior, Judy and Jessica. I feel like my name should be Aunt Jara.]

The deep south ain't NOTHIN' without the great state of Mississippi. And imagine to our great surprise, the delight of getting to spend a birthday evening at Chuck E. Cheese. I don't think the Salem, Oregon Chuck E. ever kicked it this hard:

joy.

love.

togetherness (in one "car" ride, no less).

pure bliss.

But Alas, the fun with Chuck E. and the boys could only last for so long, before the fun could begin across the freeway at the Red Lobster. On a Friday night. Need I mention that the entire town of Jackson seemed to be convening there for Lobsterfest as well, resulting in a 2.5 hour wait? [It was then that we decided to ask some patrons who just happened to be lounging and not eating or drinking at the bar to let us have their seats. What would you do? We claim west coast ignorance of southern rules of hospitality, but some have advised that that's a universal "no-can-do" rule no matter where one resides...]

Indeed, together the three of us shared two Lobsterfest plates and stuffed ourselves silly (thus only adding to the deep south weight gain that is inevitable regardless of visits to the Lob). We were especially excited that Cousin Gordie decided to make the trek down and back, just for dinner, from Arkansas merely to see his cousin James - now that's love!

And on to more family time it was: on Saturday morning we attended the Blacks in Government brunch at a local hotel. Yes, I was the only white woman there if you're wondering (and yes, that seems to be a normal occurance having married a black man from the south. We're used to it, the family's used to it, but the culture itself - need I say, but they aren't necessarily "used" to it yet).

Here resides some of the ladies of the family: cousin Charlotte, mama Judy and little ol' me.

JHM and JHM - I love their father-son smiles.

Let James and I never be too old to dance to live music.

Though SO much more happened while we were in the deep south, the pictures appropriately end here with some swingin' time in front of the Cracker Barrel. Might I get a couple of those for our settin' ...deck?

Till next time, Jackson...

it's a happy birthday-day to the best man I know.

2011-03-31T20:58:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the hubs' birthday, so in fabulous birthday fashion, here are 43 things I love about the man! (And realize that there are just some things that will be kept between he and I - ba bam).

James, I love...

1. your smile.
2. how much you love American Idol.
3. how much AI makes you giggle.
4. said smile when you then start CRYING you're laughing so hard.
5. how you "let" me beat you at Words With Friends, and any and all games involving letters.
6. how excited you then get to play PHASE 10.
7. how good you are at doing the dishes and cleaning up every night.
8. how when I make something especially delicious, and you clothes your eyes, truly savoring every taste.
9. how you pursued me in dating...and engagement...and now in marriage.
10. how you call me every afternoon just to say hello.
11. how you greet me with pure LOVE upon walking in the door.
12. how you make fun of my sleepy self upon leaving in the morning.
13. how much you love the neurotic mr. darcy.
14. how you go on early morning runs with MD.
15. how you continue to seek to win the crazy dog over.
16. how much you love the pioneer woman!
17. how you love to read.
18. how you love jesus and love to sing to him.
19. how you love people so, so well.
20. how you seek the best for our current and future family.
21. how you set a budget (and love doing so!)
22. how much you cheerlead and support me.
23. how you sing your little heart out even if you're completely off-key.
24. how you then make up words to songs, still off-key.
25. how intelligent you are.
26. how you want to be your best self and strive for excellence.
27. how at the bottom of it you're human, and you just want to be loved and understood.
28. how you put up with me all the time rearranging and "hiding" things around the house.
29. that you're from Mississippi!
30. that you have an incredible story, and god's not done with you yet.
31. that you're an AMAZING dancer.
32. that you come fully alive when Prince and MJ are played.
33. that you say "Valentime's" day. Still. at age 43.
34. that you're just a little snuggle-bug.
35. that you love my family, and love to love them and be loved by them.
36. that there's not a judgmental bone in your body.
37. that you say what's on your mind.
38. that you can't be put in a box, and you're just full of surprises!
39. that you love holding little babies. seriously now.
40. that you love to work out.
41. that you shine in who you are, and not in who you're not.
42. that you seek to put others first.
43. that you're MINE!

happy birthday, love bucket!

pics that tell stories.

2011-03-25T14:34:00.000-07:00

1. Wyldlife superhero club: what's not to love about this picture?

2. A dear friend of mine, Miss Davis, from our teaching days at Monte Vista, got married a couple weeks ago. This I love: it's her turn. Weddings now seem to bring about a different type of emotion: celebration. As the years as a single girl went on, I'd wonder when it was finally going to be my turn, and as much as I cheered on him or her on, still in the pit of my stomach/back of my heart/whatever the phrase might be, I was sad and frustrated and mad and __________ that I wasn't the one in the poofy white dress. So as my perspective has changed a little now, I can honestly say that at the bottom of my heart, there is JOY and THANKS and nothin' but LOVE for the one standing up front. Congrats Jenn and Matt on it being your turn.

And now to steal some pics from James' computer so that we can tell more stories...

you. drive. me. crazy.

2011-03-25T09:58:00.000-07:00

I remember as a little girl doing the following motions:

pointing to my brother + putting both hands in the air, gripping the invisible steering wheel then in a driving motion + pointing to me + making the ca-razy (!) face.

You. Drive. Me. Crazy.

As James and I just successfully passed the 7th month hump of marriage, it has come to my attention that perhaps there are some imperfections on my part. Just a few.

1. Admittedly, I don't like to make the bed. He likes the bed made. That's been said here before, and hasn't gone away yet.

2. I apparently have a problem wiping down the counters, especially after said baked item requires being rolled in flour. He really likes the counters to be clean. This is problematic, folks.

3. I like the heat off at night because I seem to have an internal temperature gauge of 1 billion degrees. He, like a bear hibernating, likes to be all cocooned up in a hot house with lots of covers. What to do, what to do.

4. We live in a condo, so even though Mr. Darcy gets copious amounts of exercise throughout the day with walks and runs and Chuck-it sessions, he still has to go potty right before bedtime. And that means one of us has to take him. I really like playing paper-rock-scissors to determine the winner. James reasons that there must be a more logical problem-solving solution. Oh boy.

5. James likes to DVR the NCAA basketball tournament for "us" but not Grey's Anatomy. Don't get me started - don't even get me started.

But since the honey is away for the weekend, I find myself missing him already - so I'll stop there in these lamentations. What drives your honey crazy?

Thunder-shades.

2011-03-19T14:56:00.000-07:00

Sunday morning I woke up to what I thought was a migraine, complete with headache and my right eye pulsating in pain, super sensitive to light. By Monday the headache was gone, but the eye was still hurting like it was goin' out of style, and I ended up opting out of Young Life that night because the lights from other drivers' cars were too bright. Hmmm. Then Tuesday I had a meeting down in Los Altos, about an hour away, and in morning traffic had to pull over on the side of the FREEWAY because I kept having to close my eyes while driving.

Seriously Cara, do you think you have super bionic, invincible driving powers?

It was then that I realized that maybe I should get the eyeball checked out - and lo and behold, it was an eye ulcer! Really, it's worse than it sounds. Really, the pain and light sensitivity cleared up by Friday morning, just in time to finish writing my Fuller paper on John 2:1-11. [Side note: I've always been a procrastinator - hey, it's when I do my best work! This time, I thought SURELY I will and can get my paper turned in before its Friday due date. But with the ulcer came an aversion to computer screens and books both, so all 15 pages were pounded out, pain-free from 8.07 am yesterday till 4.39 pm. Ba-bam! Will my procrastination never cease?]

In the meantime, I got to wear these rockin' shades that some of the kids I work with dubbed THUNDER-SHADES. I also got "pimpin'" and "hipster" at one point. One of the best moments of THUNDER-SHADE redemption came Thursday afternoon at one of the local high schools; we do "Young Life" (sans a Christian talk) there once a month, simply building relationships and serving the school. But we still get to do a little inspirational message, so to speak - so I owned the current THUNDER-SHADES situation, complete with the following Judy Garland quote:

"Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else."

That's right! I'm going to be the first-rate, THUNDER-SHADES version of me, you'd better believe it! ...So, with whatever situation is going on in your life, how are you going to own the present circumstances, and just be you, not comparing yourself to others? Own those THUNDER-SHADES, I tell you!

a weekend that just makes sense.

2011-02-27T20:55:00.000-08:00

This past weekend James, Mr. Darcy and I drove 2.75 hours north-ish to celebrate the 90th birthday of one great man: my grandfather. We jam-packed 24 hours as full as one could make it, starting out with the search for the perfect beanie:

James, if you haven't noticed, has quite the healthy ~~fetish~~ fascination with always covering his cold, bald head - hence a cousin trip to downtown Grass Valley to see the sights as we searched for the perfect hat!

We had quite the adventure in trying to find a place to stay this weekend; generally we stay with family when visiting Nevada City, but there was no room at the inn this weekend! Much family + a foot of snow + a beloved ~~problem~~ dog named Mr. Darcy made for a tough time trying to find a place to stay after our original plan ended up with a power outage and lack of way in there with the local road closed. It was then that we stumbled upon Swan Levine, a fabulous bed and breakfast that one posed as a Nevada County hospital where none other than my dad and his two younger sisters were born! Of course, once they heard where we were staying, they decided to come check in as well:

The "surgery room" (or "pink room", as it's sometimes called to unsuspecting visitors) still boasts its original tile floor!

this is why everyone should support their local B & B:

And because we were able to take our ~~deranged~~ lovable Darcy-pup!

And also because such coffee makes you take such pictures as this:

Sometimes we like to pretend like we're really, really tough, just to scare the ~~masses~~ few who might be convinced.

To celebrate Grandpa's birthday, the whole fam-damily went to THE WILLO off old 49. I wish I could describe the beauty of this old roadside diner: it's kindof the city's best kept local secret, at least for the meat-eating types. They've got a fat grill in the middle of the dank, dark restaurant, so you know your meat's being grilled to perfection. You can choose from three different sizes of steak, or get chicken, halibut, or catfish - James, of course, chased after his southern roots and ate catfish for dinner, while I opted for the halibut. (mmm, my favorite!). Every meal is the same: meat, salad, baked potato and beans. AND a scoop of ice cream for dessert - I mean, come on, people!

So here pictured is (my) Uncle Kensell, just hanging out with his grandbaby Nicole. Love.

It was then time to remember why we ventured to Nevada City in the first place: to celebrate 90 years of life! Grandpa then proceeded to direct us like the family chorus we are, only then to be topped by a toasting speech. Hey, when I'm 90, I'm sure as hell going to be toasting myself!

You work those boots, girl! (I sure wish I could still work one leg in, one leg out!)

What grown woman doesn't like seeing her grown husband hiding under a blanket just to entertain your local three year old who needs to go to bed, but just wants to play one more game (!) with Uncle James?

The fun's not over yet! "Let's play follow the leader!" Thus followed five grown males around an old country house, stomping in the footsteps of said "I'm almost four!" little lady.

Family makes sense. Being ~~so, so weird~~ together makes sense. It was a weekend that just made sense.

dinner fixins' ...kinda.

2011-02-24T09:40:00.000-08:00

Oftentimes I'll arrange meals by what's already in our fridge that needs to be eaten, like, now. So the other day I noticed that we had extra amounts of Gruyere and Pecorino Romano cheeses. As per the first, I stumbled upon this recipe, wrote down what I didn't still have at home, and took a trip to Lucky's.

Now Lucky's is that grocery store that - dare I say - attracts quite the interesting group of people. There have been times when I've wondered how near-expiration my purchased chicken is, and if the milk was on "super sale!" because it was about to start smelling "super sour!" But still, it's our closest grocery store, so I am embracing all that Lucky's has to offer.

So what then was the last item on my list? Jerusalem artichokes. I needed a pound of them, so I searched and searched the veggies section, but to no avail - where WERE the Jerusalem artichokes, and can't regular Monterey county artichokes suffice? I decided to approach Mr. Friendly Grocer Man:

"Excuse me, sir, but do you have any Jerusalem artichokes?"

"Jerusa-what?"

"Jerusalem artichokes." He looks around - to our left are the Monterey artichokes, and to our right are some jumbo-sized even rounder artichokes that looked like this:

"You know, sometimes we get some artichokes in from the middle east that look like these ones here..." (and he points to the oversized jumbo-chokes).

Me: "Eh. Interesting...well, I have a couple of regular-sized ones at home already - I'll just use those." We exchange good-byes, and I head home to make the cheese and artichoke chowder.

Now here's what I realized I needed to do and have upon pulling out the recipe and beginning to read it for the first time:

*1 pound Jerusalem artichokes, sliced into water with 1 Tablespoon lemon juice added

How the HECK am I supposed to slice an artichoke that looks like this?

You don't have to be a kitchen rocket scientist to know that a regular ol' artichoke, especially in raw form, is not going to easily slice. It was then that I decided to actually take a look at google, and see if Mr. Friendly Grocer Man and I had been correct in our Jerusalem artichokes assumption.

...now how is THIS even considered an artichoke?

Looks like ginger to me.

Needless to say, no cheese and artichoke chowder were had for dinner...but the regular ol' artichokes were eaten alongside for good measure.

---

What's your cooking blunder of the week?

It's no secret that our friend Dr. Neil Clark Warren set James and me up....aka: through the portals of E-HARMONY. And when you're in the midst of online dating, it's kind of this weird, dirty little closet secret that no one's supposed to know - but you want to meet someone, and so here you are, secretly online chatting away with the world, trying to get to know this person through the portals of cyberspace. It's weird...but for some of us, it works. So today, upon writing back to a friend who's entering the online dating journey, she had some questions. Here follows some answers (to her questions...and then some) to this now-anonymous, amazing woman:

---

1. There might be a few different rounds of it [online dating], and that's okay! I think between eharm and match I probably did 5 or 6 different rounds over the course of like 5 or 6 years. (ie: once a year I'd realize that I needed to get out more and date because I wasn't meeting anyone through YL or teaching).

2. Just be yourself...simple, I know, but be yourself in your answers (and not in what you think they want to hear), and also be yourself in your initial response to these men, ie: am I actually attracted to THEM or simply to the idea of dating in general? Am I only writing back to them because I feel bad, or do I really want to talk to them? I think that's one of the best things about online dating: it almost gets rid of the first couple of dates for you because you're putting stuff out there, getting to know the other person. For me, if I couldn't imagine making out with him, DELETE! Classy, I know....but I had to be attracted to the person.

3. You're going to be attracted to people who aren't attracted to you. People are going to be attracted to you whom you're not attracted to....so, don't take it too seriously and just have fun! Dating is just getting to know someone, and if that someone isn't someone you could ultimately see yourself with, then just say good-bye!

4. BUT don't think that you have to decide whether or not you're going to marry this person on the first date. I think for a lot of us in Christendom at least who haven't dated in awhile, it's like, a rare gem to find an actual date - but if the whole point of dating is (again) getting to know someone, then simply focus on that and not on the crazy far-off future.

5. So...in answer to your questions: don't be "that" girl who keeps messaging them if they haven't responded. Play the game, though: if you've been communicating for awhile, feel a connection, but haven't heard back, then hit them up again. If you just liked their profile but really have no history, then don't be a stalker. They'll write you back when they're darn good and ready.

6. The balance of showing interest but not too much interest: here's what I think. If you're into a guy, then let him know that you're into him. That doesn't mean you have to write him an email saying, "hey, I'm into you - are you into me?" but you can show him you're interested by doing just what you'd do with a YL kid upon hanging out: get to know them. Ask questions. And see if there's something worth pursuing.

7. If you're asking whether or not the guy has to pursue, I think the online dating world erases all of that nonsense. Wink at him or pursue getting to know him (match or eharm - whatever your flavor is) - and unless in his profile he says "...and I am ultra-conservative and want to be the one establishing all first communication with the female species," then let him pursue. But do you really want to be with that guy anyway?

8. Men: Bottom line, if a guy's into you, he'll be into you. There's nothing that's going to stop him...I firmly believe that about men. He'll write you, he'll call you, he'll set up a date. he'll want to respond to your emails or however you're communicating. And if he's not into you, then he's not worth it, and you shouldn't be worrying your pretty little head over him anyway! (Read "He's Just Not That Into You" if you haven't already - I liked the book better than the movie, and personally found it SO empowering!)

9. Another thing: as you're communicating with a few or a bunch of different men, chances are he's communicating with a few or a bunch of different women. It might be slow at first (ie: weekly?), but then something will spark, and maybe you'll find yourself writing back and forth every day....and that's a good thing.

10. The story of James: James is a grown 42-year-old man. James knew what he wanted and wasn't scared to go after it (ie: me). Maybe that's the difference between men and boys....so strive for a man. As per us communicating, it started out small and rather sporatic (as I was communicating with a slew of other suitors, I'd like to imagine), but then he just kept coming back...and the emails kept getting better...and he emailed when he said he was going to email, and called when he said he was going to call, and well, also had good grammar skills (because I'd realized that I couldn't be with a guy who used "lets get 2gether" in the context of a sentence. That didn't work for me).

11. So, just be yourself. Be yourself, be yourself, be yourself. And figure out what you like and don't like because that's one of the best things about online dating. You might end up going out on a bunch of different dates this round, or you might not - and that too is okay. :)

Can't WAIT to hear how it goes!

xoxo, c.

---

What experiences have YOU had in the online dating world? What do you agree with or disagree with in the above writings? Thoughts, thoughts, thoughts!

a date most memorable...

2011-02-16T22:28:00.001-08:00

Date: January 1, 2010.

James and I had only been dating about three months, but for this most memorable new year's date, he had scored tickets to see one of his favorite singers, Ledisi.

So I had on my sassy sparkly and a little-low-cut dress, and he was dressed to the nines in one of those crisp white shirts that just looks PERFECT on him (...and I digress...) - but of course one must eat dinner beforehand.

Across the street from Yoshi's is a little hole in the wall place that serves this:

(we're generally pretty boring pizza people - a good ol' margarita does it for us...)

And so the conversation ensued, to - what else? - new year's resolutions:

Cara: "I'd like to ...hmmm, go running with Mr. Darcy more this year." (Visions of a super skinny-minnie Cara, completing half-marathons in her spare time are dancing thru my head).

James: "I'd like to ...hmmm, marry you this year!"

Cara: jaw drops.

James: smiles.

Conversation: begins to take a turn for the much, much better.

Though we didn't end up getting engaged for a couple more months, I won't soon forget that night of new year's resolution conversations. His clearly trumped mine - and as for the dog? He gets some good runs in at the dog park just about every day. :)

...that in first class they don't serve plastic.

A kind, older gentleman waits on you and calls you ma'am.

They wipe your hands with warm towels if you just can't seem to muster the strength to do it yourself.

They serve you a full meal, with your choice of salmon or ravioli.

Adult beverages are free.

Refills are abundant.

Wine comes not out of a little individual 4 ounce bottle, but out of the real deal big bottle.

You have your choice of ice cream and brownies or cheese and crackers for dessert.

And if your tea isn't hot enough, well then, new tea for you!

The flight attendants walk through every two minutes just to make sure you're comfortable.

And I forgot! They serve you mixed nuts as an appetizer!

And an American Airlines mint just to top off the flight!

---

How do I know this? You must think I flew first class to and from Mississippi.

Not quite.

At all.

Nope.

But I was in the first seat of coach and watched EVERY little movement those blessed 20 passengers received, while I drooled and stared and got green-eyed with envy. And then delightedly rejoiced when the kind, older gentleman brought me leftover mixed nuts and threw a mint my way.

"Someday, someday I'm going to fly first class! It's on my list of things to do before I die! So in the meantime, do you think I could have a free upgrade? I'll be your best friend..." (wink, wink, nod nod - james is asleep anyway).

"What? Do you think this is Delta or somethin'?"

I am silenced.

Buh-bye.

I still declare best friends.

2011-02-08T21:59:00.000-08:00

I remember back in the 7th grade a note was passed to me that looked something like this:

Dear Cara,

You're awesome! I've had a lot of fun hanging out and having sleepovers and passing notes. I think you're:

Funny!
Popular!
Nice!
Really, really fun!
A good friend!

So, I think we should be best friends. Would you like to be my bff (best friend forever)? Check:

___Yes
___No
___Maybe so.

LYLAS!

---

Today I almost somewhat sort of did the same thing upon meeting my blog hero, Ree Drummond of the Pioneer Woman: "Hi Ree! My name's Cara. We're best friends even though you don't know it yet. So, when do you want to invite me to your lodge?"

I think I wore a nice enough smile that she didn't think I was a creeper.

Then she signed my book and we took a picture together. See? Best friends.

the recents, the upcomings and making lemonade.

2011-02-07T20:32:00.000-08:00

...tomorrow night james and jeannie and patty and I get to meet our blog hero, p-dub, aka: the pioneer woman. She really does have a first name, and that name is Ree. We're basically best friends, although she doesn't quite know it yet.

Did you notice that JAMES is excited to meet p-dub? he's a believer in her food, so don't you think that i talked him into going. This is of his own volition.

...wednesday morning james and I head to the great state of Mississippi for a visit to see his side of the family. I plan to relax, eat southern food, go to a dancin' gospel church, ask lots of questions, laugh, read, have 3 little girls put make-up on me and do my hair and come back with a greater understanding of my husband and his family.

Did I mention that I'm participating in the Biggest Loser competition right now? Somehow I don't think eating lard-greased, butter-filled, deep-fried Mississippian food really goes along with what we're trying to accomplish.

...last night I watched the superbowl. Kindof. I more so watched the commercials and read p-dub's "From Black Heels to Tractor Wheels," but I think I fooled some people.

We did have a cheese-filled baked pasta to commemorate the cheesehead's win - see, I was watching.

After I finished the book.

...this past weekend we took 40 kids and leaders up to Young Life's Mountain Lodge in Soda Springs, CA - in Tahoe national. What a GREAT weekend. Such an encouragement...such a cool, cool thing to look back on the past 3 1/2 years and see what God's done. I believe it and I receive it.

The above pic was taken during YL's Winter Formal on Saturday night. This is my date, Alan - don't tell the hubs. He might get jealous. [Side note to Winter Formal: we intentioned that it would be a time of appetizers and pictures, but then the lasagna was an hour behind schedule due to a broken oven so a real live Winter Formal dance party ensued. Just makin' lemonade.]

I'd also like to point out that some kids really did think I paid money for that dress.

From Nordstrom.

Now I know you can't see it, but I would never pay money for a light pink anything. Ew.

Magenta? Now that's another story.

....tonite my friend Stephanie and I decided to bond and PAY people money to kick and punch a really heavy thing hanging from the ceiling. Indeed, we went to LA BOXING and attended their Monday night kickboxing class. Almost two hours later, I think my face is still red. And my arms hurt. And my legs. And my abs. But I still want to be her friend, so that's a good sign.

a dialogue, some haikus and a hot hubs

2011-02-01T11:51:00.000-08:00

I'm having a "did I finally get the flu?"/can't get up from the couch/stop yer whining kind of couple of days - BUT instead of moanin' and groanin' about it, I thought I'd highlight some things that just put a smile on my face:

This is my buddy, Keisa - and I LOVE this girl. Now a senior in high school, she's been around YL for a couple of years now, but now our friendship is at the place of mutuality. She's eager to love and to learn and be challenged, and she rises to the occasion every time (which makes me ask...do I do the same? Am I eager to love? Am I open to learning and being challenged? I love that about her, and desire to do and be the same in my own life). Anyhoo, this particular day, she and I had a date to hang out:

"Hey Keisa, what do you want to do?"

"Oh, I don't know, Cara, whatever..." (Oh, she's so polite!)

"Well, do you want to run an errand with me? We could go grocery shopping, or - this is pretty random - we could go register for my friend for her wedding."

"Yeah, whatever, Cara. Whatever you want to do."

"No, choose!"

"Okay, let's go grocery shopping."

"Good choice! But I think I just changed my mind...we're gonna go register!" (Way to go, Cara - way to throw "choices" out there, encouraging her to voice her opinion, and then take it right back. Me, me, me!)

So that we did: we went on over to Macy's and registered for a bride-to-be who didn't quite have the time to register. Since all we had to do was basically get a 100 things on the registry, it didn't matter that Keisa didn't know an ounce about Jenn's style - so we just went to town!

Ba-bam. I love this girl.

Oh, the beloved dog. Today I dedicate some 5-7-5's to you:

Mr. Darcy dog
You sure do like the dog park
And your neighbor Mark.

Short term memory
is what your auntie calls you
Little crazy - you!

You're black and you're white
Just like mama and papa
And Michael Jackson.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

And what picture posting wouldn't be complete without a lovable shot of the hubs and me back in December getting our first Christmas tree? Lovely blue skies. Lovely Mr. Meredith. Lovely life.

dancin' fool.

2011-02-01T11:22:00.000-08:00

"Cara, what do you do for a living?"

That's always one of those questions that varies in answer depending on the day, the audience, the season, etc., etc. But one thing is constant: a good chunk of my job is spent hanging out with high school kids, in their world. I volunteer after school at one such high school a couple days a week, and we recently started up a GIRLS ONLY! work-out program on Thursdays. Here follows this past Thursday with white girl Cara + seven lovely Latino ladies:

me: "Hey ladies, what do you want to do for a work out today? We could go for a walk outside-"

Lovely Latina #1: "No, we Mexican - we don't walk, we RUN!"*

me: "Okay....so, I brought this really cool work out video called Insanity, and it's insane! Want to do that?"

Lovely Latina #2: "Does it have Mexican music?"

me: "uh, no, I don't think so-"

Lovely Latina #3: "We want to dance! We want to dance to our music!"

me: "As your work out?"

All the Lovely Latinas: "YEAH! Let's dance! Oooh, girl [that's me] we gonna teach you how to dance."

Hence, we found an open classroom and began dancing.

We spent 45 minutes in a circular conga-line, dancing to latest and greatest in Mexican beats. Sometimes we'd then conga out to the hallway and they'd follow the white lady's Stayin' Alive hand motions, laughing all the while. Then we'd head back into the stuffy classroom and shake it out.

"Girl [that's me], this ain't no salsa music - stop moving your hips so much. just dance!"

me: "Gotcha."

So we'd form a circle again, and we'd laugh and giggle and teach each other how to shake it properly and mariachi it up some more. By the end of what was a very sweaty dance session, they had one accolade for me:

"Girl [you know that's me], for a beginner, you're pretty good at dancing to beaner* music."

Well, thank you.

I love my "job." I love those days, when the littlest thing puts the biggest smile on your face...when you just keep laughing and telling the story, getting giddier all the while. THIS was one of those days.

---

*I realize that there are a couple of things that are racially questionable in here, so realize that I'm not making fun of these girls, but simply writing down and echoing their words.

mortification, 9th grade style.

2011-01-27T19:19:00.000-08:00

I was a freshman in high school, and I was as 9th grade as they come: I pretty much wore the same outfits week after week because they just defined me. I had my Scottish skirt and my dresses from Hawaii, and my stretch pants. And I worked it. So here we were, 14 years old at McNary High School in Keizer, OR 97303. [Side note: I love zip codes!]

My friend Birdy and I had MADE it big-time: we had auditioned and successfully gotten a role in the chorus of the all-time favorite high school musical, GREASE. So when the bell rang at 2.15 one cloudy afternoon, we quickly figured out the math that we had just enough time to take a bus to our old middle school, pay a visit to our favorite teacher, and bus back to the high school in time for play practice at 3 o'clock.

The plan worked for the most part, except for one minor detail: we didn't make the bus back to the high school. We ran. We speed-walked. We sweated. And we freaked out, because what if we ended up late for play practice?!

Finally, right near 3 pm, we arrived at the back of the school, only to realize that a 15-foot chain link fence stood in our way. Why would there be a back entrance to the school, when only one entrance was sufficient?

Fear not! Birdy was a professional fence-hopper.

I, alas, was not.

Birdy, the pro that she was, hopped up and over the chain-link fence in about 2.5 seconds.

Cara, the professional fence-hopper that she wasn't, hopped up the chain-link fence in about 2 minutes and got stuck at the top. With the aforementioned stretch pants on, plus penny loafers and a butt-covering sweater to boot.

I swayed and wavered at the top of the fence, trying to get over the little spikey things at the top, while my hands bloodied and subsequently wiped themselves on the white stretch pants.

Meanwhile, with Birdy motioning me to "Get down!" from the bottom, so did the restless spectators: the three lanes of traffic behind us, honking and shouting their words of encouragement in the process - and the three football teams, who had stopped their afternoon practices and were watching this spectacle of a freshman girl who couldn't quite get over the other side of the fence.

I was mortified.

I was embarrassed beyond belief.

But most of all, I was SO afraid that I'd get kicked out of the play! What, no "Freddy, My Love," no, "Summer Lovin'"?

We aborted the plan: I climbed back DOWN the fence, blood on my torn white stretch pants and all, and Birdy huffily climbed back up and over the fence - in, of course, about 2.5 seconds.

And as we walked, with our heads hanging droopily between our legs, we then came to realize that not more than 100 feet in front of us was an actual back entrance to the school: a real live opening for us to walk through and not have to climb up and over.

It was mortification at its finest - but it makes for a pretty good story almost twenty years later. :)

Do you ever feel like you're having one of those days filled with learning life's lessons?

I feel like I'm having one of those YEARS.

And it's good, but it's hard.

I want to be right - but I'm learning to let go.

I want to love more - but I'm learning that it must still be simpler than I'm making it out to be.

I want to follow my heart - but I'm pairing that with not getting ahead of God's timing.

I want to shout answers from the rooftops because I've been through the muck and I don't want these loved ones to experience the ickiness and stickiness and grossness and hurt of it all - but they too have to sift through the sludge.

I'm learning that what I want isn't always what I need, or what fits into the budget - and I hate having to then say no (especially to a favorite friend's wedding, like one this weekend...).

I'm then learning that saying no is a good thing - even if I'm not left with my five options to choose from at the end of the day, like I boasted about at age 22.

I'm learning to ask more questions and try to listen even better, because I don't know it all yet - but a lot of times I think I do know it all, so I have to go back to the beginning.

And whether it's in marriage or with family and friends, or even with my precious (...) middle and high school friends, sometimes there are more questions than there are answers. And that doesn't always seem fair ...but maybe it helps to mold us and shape us and make us better and wiser people along the way.

What are you learning?

preciousness.

2011-01-23T21:02:00.000-08:00

I used to hear the word "precious," and think of babies, or in a more pastel and cheesy sort of way, the cherubim-like porcelain figurines of my youth: Precious Moments. But recently precious has taken on a whole new meaning...

1. My husband is precious. He's precious when he turns into a giddy little school boy when football is on. He's precious when he thinks that I'm the best cook in the world. He's precious when, as he's doing right now, he does his nightly stretches. He's precious when he takes the dog out. He's just precious in general.

2. My dog is precious. I know, Mr. Darcy, the psycho canine that he is, how can he truly be precious? Oh, but he is. He's precious when he gets scared (over the toaster, no less...) and nuzzles up next to me. He's precious when he gets so excited upon seeing neighbor dog and fur-covered compatriot Ruckus, and he gets that doggy-smile on his face. He's precious when he sprints like a gazelle towards the chuck-it ball and I have no hope of ever catching him. [Hence why we will always and forever be working on C-O-M-E-H-E-R-E.]

3. My neighbor Mark is precious. This is Ruckus' dad, and he's become the most constant person in my life besides the hubs. Every morning he texts me with one word, "wuf," and I know that it's time to bring the coffee outside and commence throwing the ball with doggy 1 and doggy 2. We share life and laugh and ask hard questions and try to get our dogs to obey their masters - and that to me, in sharing life with the people in your very own neighborhood - is just precious to me.

...

I remember my friend Shelley telling me about when she knew that her husband was "the one": he was just precious to her. She couldn't help but see this beautiful quality emanating from Scott, this descriptor of preciousness. And "precious" to me at that time seemed the farthest thing from the masculine Knight on a White Horse we'd been dreaming of up until that point - but now I get it. I get that in the every day things of life, we see preciousness. We see the hubs and the dogs and the Mark's of this world, and we see them as precious.

And for that, I am grateful.

you're so vain...

2011-01-18T16:31:00.000-08:00

you probably think this song is about you.

That is the theme of today's post, because somehow in my mind, I still think this song of life is about me.

I still seem to be suffering from ego-centrism, like I often teach about with middle school kids. Life is about me. The world centers around me - and when I walk into a room, everyone is looking at me, thinking about me, watching me, wondering about me, fill-in-the-blank _______ about ME. Hence, ego-centrism at its finest.

While on a lent kick a few years ago, I gave up make-up for forty days. That in and of itself was a feat for me because I'd been so used to adorning myself with Mac and Stila and Maybelline alike, but had become dependent upon it for beauty. I remember feeling distraught, knowing in advance that I'd be giving up make-up over my birthday. Oh, the one day of the year that I WANT to wear make-up! But that birthday came and went - as did the other 39 days, and the thing is, I realized and learned that all - ALL - of it was in my head. The truth was, no one really noticed that I wasn't wearing make-up unless I pointed it out. And the response then generally was something like this: "Oh really? Huh." NO. BIG. DEAL.

I'm so vain I probably think this song is about me...

Fast forward: somewhere over the course of, I don't know, October, November, December, my contacts really started to bug me. I was putting eyedrops in them all the time, and switching mascaras here and there [because I did start wearing it again, as I realized that my beauty wasn't dependent on this outward adornment...], and wearing my glasses more often.

My glasses.

Bleh.

Memories of wearing glasses half the size of my face in the 4th, 5th and 6th grades started coming back to me, and along with it came the silly name "four eyes," and the belief that my beauty was diminished by wearing glasses. Because there's that 7th grade ego-centric self that believed that she became that much MORE beautiful when she got contacts. She became bold when she didn't have to hide behind those thick lenses.

I'm so vain I probably think this song is about me. Don't I? Don't I?

So a couple of eye doctor appointments later, and we've found that there's a scratch on the cornea.

Not a big deal - in fact, it's pretty common. But it also means not wearing my glasses for a couple of weeks.

Am I silly? Am I vain? Am I normal? Do we all think this "song" is about us every once in awhile?

Signing off, Carly Simon

nostalgia. it's here.

2011-01-11T19:24:00.000-08:00

Christmas has come and gone.

New years has come and gone.

Suddenly we find ourselves almost in mid-January, and I still feel like I'm trying to catch my breath. It's the reality that life really does go by in the snap of the fingers. Wasn't it just yesterday that I was standing, nervous and sweaty-palmed behind the trellis in my auntie's backyard, waiting for my turn to (finally!) walk down the aisle? Wasn't I just starting Young Life staff, like two minutes ago? Wasn't college graduation just a week or so ago, and I didn't have any clue what I was going to do with "...the rest of the story..." And here we are, January 11, 2011, and I suppose I'm feeling rather nostalgic.

I'm feeling rather nostalgic that my husband - husband! - just had the best Christmas of his entire 42 years-long life. And though it may not seem like "nostalgia" is the word to use, it IS because I just keep replaying that week in Oregon over and over again in my mind. I hear that when you become a parent there's nothing like seeing the joy of Christmas (or whatever event, for that matter), through the eyes of a child ... and here I get to see it through the eyes of another more seemingly grown-up child. But to see James absorbed and excited and elated over our silly, seemingly mundane Christmas traditions of chopping down the Christmas tree, eating crab and fondue for Christmas dinner, and handing out and opening Christmas presents, oldest to youngest, one at a time, I LOVED it. And this little tidbit week of nostalgia I'll continue to keep in my pocket to remember and cherish and hold dear to my heart.

It was the best Christmas gift I could have gotten - and granted, I need not take back that really, really pair of sparkly earrings or the Sunset cookbook or the beautiful quilt, but this, this was the best gift I could have been given.

I receive you, nostalgia, and all that comes with your remembrances.

Mr. Darcy (how could we have a post without a picture of the hooch?) got the Christmas munchies. Note the wrapping paper piece hanging out of the side of his mouth as well.

Tis the season for the kids (minus Brandon and Melissa) to have fabulously individualized Santa hats: Mikey goes Navy, Aleah goes rawwwwr, Cara the pretty pretty princess, and James with his earmuff-filled warmth!

Since their first Christmas, Mom and Dad have fought over their first turkey wishbone ornament - and this year was no exception.

The fam - minus the FOUR dogs - chopping down the Christmas tree!

Cheers!

get yo' soup on

2011-01-06T15:07:00.000-08:00

Want to know what soup's on for SOUPLA 2011 this Friday night? Let's see... (update: 3.31 pm, 1/7)

1. P-dub's tomato soup
2. Curried Coconut Chicken soup
3. Florentine white bean soup
4. barley and lentil with swiss chard or spinach
5. Greek lentil soup
6. bread!
7. red wine and sourdough bread
8. crackers and vino
9. panini press
10. wine, crackers, and a can of Dinty Moore Beef Stew
11. homemade chili
12. minestroni + dessert
13. corn chowder --- or crusty french bread and wine
14. Safeway soup

Reply to this post, or email cara at caramac54@gmail.com with what soup (or bread....or crackers....or vino) you're bringing. See ya SOUPer soon!

(are the soup jokes getting old yet?)

You know you're in Oregon when...

2010-12-29T16:05:00.001-08:00

We spent the Christmas holiday up in Oregon, which is where I grew up. Because it was James' first time visiting the homeland, there was lots to take note of, and in particular, I almost felt like I was seeing my home state for the first time. Here follows a list of "you know you're in Oregon when..." for your viewing pleasure:

(in no particular order, but Oregonians out there, feel free to pick your #1, and/or add to it!)

1. Teenage girls wear short shorts in 50 degree weather, pasty white legs and all.

2. Gas stations employ these people called attendants who pump your gas for you, and even wash the windshield at no extra charge. It is guaranteed that it will startle your husband who has never NOT pumped his own gas upon every visit.

3. No sales tax! Shopping is a field day because "it's like saving 10% automatically!" (said one such James - he is in finance, I suppose).

4. Strangers actually look you in the eye and say hello.

5. People greet you with "Merry Christmas" instead of "Happy Holidays."

6. There are equal numbers of drive-thru coffee stands as there are pizza parlors, one on every corner.

7. You see a man who looks like Mr. Pauley, your favorite 9th and 12th grades history teacher, so you follow him around the local Roth's grocery store. Then you realize that there are a lot of old, bald, white men in the town. Was it you, Mr. P? Love Monster.

8. You find yourself appreciating not seeing BMWs and Mercedes zooming pasting you, cutting you off every 50 feet.

9. The state colors fluctuate between green and yellow, and orange and black - both making your Auburn-cheering hubby mad.

10. People actually drive the speed limit on the freeway...

11. Said people don't pull to the slow lane if they're in the fast lane, because hey, 65 MPH is fast!

12. You have to work hard to get the hard stuff - ie: grocery stores only sell wine and beer, not hard liquor. But what about my hot buttered YUM?

13. Life just seems a little easier, and not so complicated...

14. No fog needed, says James - you find yourself driving straight through the clouds. Grey, grey, grey is everywhere.

15. Shaniquah the Subaru is not alone, as Outbacks have achieved world domination in the northwest.

16. The state encourages cliff jumping by naming a creek, "Jumpoff Joe Creek." Joe would sue you in California.

17. The sun seems to go to bed at 4 in the afternoon, and then sleep in till 8 the next morning. I have a hard time with those long hours...

18. Wait, what sun? (Just kidding - the first few days we were there were filled with that spectacular rain-free, cold, sunshine winter days).

19. A sun addendum: you hear real live chants of "rain, rain, go away" coming from the hallways of your local schoolhouse.

20. Your local high school and alma mater still looks like your local penitentary.

randomness

2010-12-20T16:09:00.000-08:00

1. if you have a dog and need to laugh, read this: dogs don't understand basic concepts...

2. last night we had our first annual (only annual?) 70's Fondue Christmas Party. Please combine this concept with the current Biggest Loser contest I'm participating in and see if the two go together.

3. I've recently been sporting some pretty incredible Christmas outfits....last night's to be posted soon, so in the meantime, here's a little sneak peak of other holiday goodness:

4. I'm hungry. Maybe the Biggest Loser IS working! But in the meantime, we're going to see our old camp friends Scooby and Grommett for dinner tonite. Currently, Eric is kicking my butt in Words With Friends (Scrabble on the iphone), so I'm really really mad and mostly jealous at him. But we'll see, as this dinner MIGHT redeem the friendship. We'll see. Want to know where we're grubbing tonite? Farmer Brown.

5. I wonder if people realize my sarcasm at times and really do think I'm a hater. Hmmm...

6. Tomorrow morning, bright n early (5 am! Am I a farmer? No!) we're trekking up to Oregon for the holiday week. I am BEYOND delighted.

7. If you think of it, pray and/or send happy thoughts our way for NO blizzards. Need a reference? The Christmas Drive Two Years Ago By Cara.

I think that's about it...merry christmas to all, and to all a good night!

today's 10

2010-11-30T20:58:00.000-08:00

1. the orange is over - and it's about time, because the green and red has arrived!

2. JOY and PEACE adorn our living room...but they're ain't a whole lot of other decorations. Will we even get a tree this year? That is the question.

3. This morning I made some yummy honey butter to go with some yummy homemade biscuits...but decided to use vegan "buttery sticks" in place of the real butter. NEVER DO THAT. I repeat never, ever use a buttery stick if you have to. Ick. Bleh. Yuck. Don't do it!

4. We celebrated Thanksgiving with a gluten-free, dairy-free, egg-free friend, hence the leftover buttery sticks. Again, eat fatty animal-laden real butter as much as you can!

5. Join me in therefore gaining the holiday 15 - or the marriage 15. Oh dear.

6. What are you READING now that's striking your fancy? I've been a book whore, as of late, and I want to know what you're devouring.

7. Yes, I Just said "book" and "whore" together - it's for literary affect.

8. james and I will be putting our fondue pot to use in our first annual 70's fondue christmas party. Wear 70's green and red! eat fondue! see above marriage-15 pounds!

9. we have discovered the brisbane dog park and it is just lovely. mr. darcy has a new best friend name ruckus who lives a couple doors down; ruckus is about the side of my stomach, but plays ball quite well.

10. life is good. life is good.

12 days of orangeness

2010-11-22T09:32:00.000-08:00

I think the now-extinct 30 days of pumpkin officially lasted 12 days. I'm not really sure; once my skin started turning this lovely hue of orange, I knew it was all downhill from there. Here follows the remaining days:

Day 5: a loaf of pumpkin sugary goodness. "Winner" and I were Young Life leaders together in college, once having a sleepover in my freshman room dorm...oh, if only we could find the video (that's right, it'd be on VHS) of that night now. James and I volunteered one night at a homeless shelter, serving dinner with our community group, so this yummy loaf was our addition. No regrets!

Day 5 recipe: Winnie's delish harvest loaf

1 cup butter or margarine, softened
2 cups sugar
4 eggs
1 16 oz can pumpkin
2 2/3 cups flour
2 tsp baking soda
4 tsp pumpkin pie spice
1 tsp salt
1 bag mini chocolate chips

Cream butter and sugar together with mixer. Mix in eggs and pumpkin, and then add remaining ingredients and mix. In a greased loaf pans, spread mixture evenly, and bake at 350° for 60 minutes, DO NOT OVERCOOK mini loafs 40-45 minutes.

Day 6 recipe: Pumpkin bars with cream cheese frosting. Uh-oh, you know when the recipe comes from one such southern belle, Mrs. Paula Dean, that it's gotta scream DELICIOUSNESS. Wow. Yum. Let's be glad we gave away most of the batch as to alleviate the marriage-15.

Day 6 recipe: sin on earth yumminess.

Days 7 and 11: What's for breakfast? Pumpkin muffins, what else? Since we blew up the waffle iron, muffins it is. I've actually made these twice, and ba da bing, ba da bang, yum!

Days 7 and 11 muffins: muffins without the added pecans (because we didn't have any!)

Day 8: We transported the remaining 100+ pumpkins to the county dump, so with rotten pumpkin guts on my new jeans and a nose tainted and in need of a face mask, there was no WAY I was eating pumpkin today. Bleh.

Day 9: 20 pumpkin pies! This was the catalyst for using up all the Wyldlife pumpkins: make pumpkin pies for our top 20 donors. I will hint at this one kitchen disaster that was quickly averted, after the first four pies had finished baking: if a recipe calls for SWEETENED CONDENSED MILK, don't instead use EVAPORATED milk, thereby eliminating sugar from the recipe. All I have to say is that those cans look MIGHTY similar...

Day 9 recipe: who needs sugar in a pumpkin pie? eh.

Day 10: I must say, I'm really not THAT into baking, but I feel like it's the most viable option with pumpkin, so when the idea of pumpkin crab bisque came my way, I was like BRING IT! I was so grateful for my Lily-friend who operated the blender in small portions so that I wouldn't again be scarred by blended pumpkin puree all over the kitchen when it pops off. Lily says we need to get an immersion blender...I say, Lily, you can be my blender!

Day 10 recipe: yes, I'll have some soup for dinner!

Day 11: repeat!

Day 12: P-Dub comes through again with the healthiest "butter" I've ever eaten! I've been putting this on top of applesauce, or, well let's be honest, just eating it out of the tub. Shhh.

Day 12 recipe: 1 cup pumpkin + 1 cup vanilla/plain/coconut (the last of which I had in the fridge) + 1 cup powdered sugar (dun dun dun...) + 1 t pumpkin spice = yummy goodness.

---

So with 12 days of pumpkin under my belt, 4 no-sugar pumpkin pies, enough baking to carry me into the next year, and a husband who's willing to eat it all, I say pumpkin be gone! Farewell!

pumpkins, pumpkins...

2010-11-11T11:49:00.000-08:00

I have this amazing helper of a woman who becomes the necessary detailed brain when it comes to planning wyldlife (middle school young life) events. She thinks of the big and little things, and she carries them out, and she does what she's asked, and more. So as we began planning last week's kick-off pumpkin bash, we made it her goal to get pumpkins. And get pumpkins she did - 298 of them to be exact. As the night itself came and went, so did the pumpkins - some of them that is. We seem to have about 200 extra pumpkins, and more guts than one can dream of, without the means now to properly dispose of all the said pumpkins because of the garbage company's weekly allowance. So made use of the pumpkins, I will!

Day 1: thanks to our trusty "www", I learned how to cook and puree said "pumpkin pie" pumpkins, roast a batch of seeds, and make a jarful of frosted pumpkin cookies (which I gave away all but four - girl's gotta keep off the butter weight!).

Recipe #1: Frosted pumpkin cookies...

Day 2: Our refrigerator is now chalk-full of pumpkin puree, with another two pumpkins sitting on the counter patiently waiting their time (and another 87 back at the office...). Since yesterday was a dessert, might as well incorporate today's into dinner; along with chicken parmigiana and spinach, we had pumpkin cheese puffs! Note: minus"puff," and insert "flat."

Recipe #2: The puffs that sound better than they taste...

Day 3: Is James seeing the trend yet? Well then, we're doing straight up pumpkin for dinner!

Recipe #3: pumpkin chunk + butter chunk + brown sugar goodness, roasted for an hour = yummy vegetable for dinner!

Day 4: James just learned that pumpkin can stay in the freezer for up to 6 months; he's now pretty scared that we'll be eating pumpkin through Easter. But James, we eat seasonally! Silly boy. Might as well start the day off right with pumpkin waffles!

Recipe #4: pumpkin waffles that caused the waffle iron to short-circuit and spark...

---

My goal is 30 days of pumpkin - it just sounds so doable, so practical, and perhaps for some of you, so biblical. Will we make it? Stay tuned...

bubble wrap and a cop, or two.

2010-10-18T22:23:00.000-07:00

1. cara loads three large boxes of bubble wrap into james' car (because they ain't gonna fit in the suby).

2. cara drives with a car full of said wedding present bubble wrap all over san mateo county, crossing her fingers that she doesn't back into any unsuspecting vehicles. bubble wrap may be see thru, but it's rather obstructive when it comes to vehicle safety. remember that, children.

3. cara arrives at young life for the evening, and makes the poor leaders unload all the bubble wrap into the auerwecks backyard. it quickly looks like it's been trashed, but no, it's good clean fun!

4. high schoolers arrive, and they're like kids in a candy store. without instruction, they start fashioning bubble wrap mini skirts, butt warmers, tube tops, neckties, vests, hats, etc. Don't leave home without it!

5. we play bubble wrap volleyball. success.

6. we have a bubble wrap fashion show. don't worry, the above outfits were trumped by this load of bubble wrap wedding dresses and space suits.

7. we play STOMP THE BUBBLE WRAP BUBBLES AS QUICKLY AS YOU CAN! ...but one smart 11th grader figures out that we're just trying to decrease our waste and calls us on our "pick up the garbage game." he's so smart.

8. with final bubble wrap, we wrap up a couple of new kids and put boxing gloves on them. "Don't aim for the face!" hey, it's young life. we're a punching good time.

9. nate gives a GREAT talk - and meanwhile, we begin to hear sirens.

10. and then yells.

11. And since we're in the backyard, we can hear all of this rather clearly because...

12. a car has been stolen, and the suspect, upon getting cornered, jumped out of the car and RAN!

13. ...into someone's backyard. and this happened right in front of the house. On the same street.

14. There are now 15 cop cars in the neighborhood, so we're told to have everyone go inside. NBD...no big deal. Kids love drama. It's gonna be all over facebook.

15. And I'm sure this looks really good to parents who are picking them up right about now...

WHEW! What a night.

I love my job. :)

the stills

2010-10-09T09:42:00.000-07:00

it seems like the one of the lessons young girls are taught from the age of, well, young, is that you can't change a boy. we grow up and reach adulthood and the message is only further exemplified about prospective suitors. so without picking on the hubs, i'm also learning that there are some things that i ain't changin' on. for instance:

1. I still don't like to make the bed. I thought maybe that this would be remedied with marriage, but alas, why make it if it's just going to get un-made that evening?

2. I still like to sleep more. and apparently need to sleep more. ahhh, sleep. I love you. i need you.

3. I still have this horrible habit (that I'm accepting, nonetheless and posting it here in cyberspace for all the world to see) of creating this mound of worn but still clean clothes. dirty clothes automatically get put in the laundry basket, but instead of hanging it back up, the mound just grows. i think it's in the midst of creating its own identity while we speak.

4. i still let the gas tank run to double, triple E for empty....and this drives james crazy. i like to think that i'm a woman of risk! he likes to think that i'm a woman who likes to run out of gas.

5. i still recycle everything in our house like it's going out of style, which i believe is a pretty green and eco-savvy thing to do, until said recycling begins to take over half the garage because the garbage guys can only take so much each week.

6. i still can't hone in on one thing at a time: ie: let's have 7 books i'm in the middle of reading, let's be working on 12 projects, let's take 13 years to unpack all the boxes from my old place and find a place in the house. i suppose this is normal, but i think there's that part of me that secretly thought i'd get all grown-up and focused upon marriage. it's called personality, cara.

7. slightly in regards to #2, I also still do not like to get up at the butt crack of dawn. hubs, why must you call 5.30 am glorious? It is not so!

the list goes on, and now that we're a whopping 6 weeks plus into marriage (!), the newness of putting clothes away and making beds is wearing off. what are your "stills"?

a tv couple.

2010-09-29T19:53:00.000-07:00

we started tutoring up again yesterday again, and i was immediately paired up with this cute little latina girl, a sophomore that we'll call gloria. we spent the afternoon working on her _of mice and men_ essay, and then agreed to meet up this afternoon with mango fro yo in hand. (yes, i bribe for educational purposes).

well of course, what tutor would make a child who'd already sat in school for 7 hours that day not take a break and eat her drippy frozen yogurt on a wednesday afternoon?

so we sat. and then she broke the ice.

[note: i'm not used to kids asking ME questions until we've hung out for months. that's my job ...isn't it?]

"so do you like being married?" she asked me.

"absolutely!" how do you explain to a 15-year-old girl how wonderful it is to have your biggest fan there at the end of the day, cheering you on, your best friend to hang out and just do life with?

but still, I told her just that, and let her in on what a wednesday evening at our house would look like: i'll cook dinner, then we'll eat together and he'll clean up. we'll watch glee from last night and just hang out!

it sounded completely normal to me.

gloria: "you mean, you're like one of those families on TV? you're going to eat at the same table and cuddle together and stuff?"

Um. er. no. uh..... but to this young girl, the only picture of stability, of a loving family, of eating dinner together, of sharing responsibilities, of cuddling together, is only a faraway Disney picture she's seen on television.

My heart broke at that moment. i wanted to tell her - in the middle of the public high school's library, mind you - that she CAN have this, that this IS an option. There is something so much greater that God has for her, and for her future....

Yet my words rightfully are guised by respecting the boundaries of church and state. Still my heart breaks, and secretly i want and desire for her to stay in the group home so she can keep going to this high school, and i can keep seeing her afterschool for tutoring times and eventually be able to tell her such truth over jamba juice one afternoon.

but i have to trust that even if the courts do allow her to move back in with her family (and yes, please...) that this nugget of truth that she saw and experienced these two afternoons will stay with her. it's not up to me, but sometimes I wish i could rescue these young friends who have seen no such hope except that which the boob tube transmits over the air waves.

gratefully, cm.

cake shoving and such.

2010-09-18T09:56:00.000-07:00

Once upon a Sunday afternoon, we re-enacted our wedding, young life-style. note the jeweled bling-bling crown, and the hand raised mid-air for a group sing-a-long.

they even got us a cake, and ooh wee ooh, we were so excited. scratch that: I was so excited because I'd finally be able to shove a big, mushy piece of sweetness in love's face! you can see it in both of our eyes: he's like, "...honey, you're not really going to shove cake in my face, right?" And i'm just like, "it's all downhill from here, buster!"

The form, oh the perfect form! I really should think about going into cake-shoving professionally.

Finally we have the payback picture - smiles abound, and james succumbs to peer pressure that since it's a young life wedding, he has to take one for the team. "this is for the kids, right?" "right." SUCKA! mwah ah ah ah.

it's good getting married twice. or even once, for that matter. I highly recommend it. :)

trouble.

2010-09-16T08:39:00.000-07:00

For about 8 years of my life, I had the upper hand in my relationship with Brandon, my little brother, and was able to dominate him physically. I had a mean headlock and wasn't afraid to use it, except of course when mom came around the corner, and then I'd pretend like I was gently petting his head. "Here here brother, sweet brother..." I knew I was in trouble when he started to outgrow me, and those big sister headlocks were suddenly a thing of the past. I ran for my life.

I knew I was in trouble the first day of high school, and with school map in hand that I tried so desperately to hide, all of the sudden, MEN were before me: real, grown-up senior boys with hair on their faces. We freshmen girls gawked and knew them all by name - not that they ever had a clue who we were, but man oh man, walking to my locker would never be the same.

I knew I was in trouble when I couldn't hide that I WASN'T passionately in love with teaching English and the education system as a whole. I couldn't put on the act anymore, and though I loved being with kids, I fervently wanted out of the classroom, out of the box that was suffocating me alive. So I joined Young Life staff. More trouble.

There are moments in our lives when we know that we're in trouble; we know that ain't nothin' gonna stop me now, it's alllll downhill from here.

I knew I was in trouble last Thanksgiving break, when I found myself over the border in Mexico speaking to a group of high school friends; we had no internet or cell phone reception, or flushable toilets for that matter. Here I was on Thanksgiving day, officially done speaking, with no talks to plan and organize, and not a soul around me; I sat on the bunk in the musty storage room and began thinking about all that I was thankful for. And James kept coming to mind.

We had been officially dating for less than two months at that point when it hit me: I'm in. Oh no....my heart is in it to win it, and I'm in. I'm in trouble now.

Three days later, upon arrival back in the bay area, James and I had had an impossibly perfect day when this positively trouble-filled conversation ensued:

"James, if you're going to back out, you'd better do it quickly."

"Huh?"

"I mean, if you're going to leave, if you're not IN this, then break up with me now. Fast! Stat! Do it!" (How do I tell him that my heart is in it, that I really, really, really like him? Every other man leaves - but my heart is in it, and I don't want another lonely night of bon bons, vino and a chick flick ... really now).

"What makes you think I'm going to break up with you? Have I given you any indication of such thing?"

"I'm just sayin' - let me off easy if you're out!" (I ... like ... you ... can't you hear me?)

"Cara, I don't know how else to tell you this, but I'm in. I'm in, I'm in, I'm in, I'm in. I'm not leaving. I'm in."

"You're in?"

Gulp.

"Yes, I'm in."

Pause. Tears.

"[insert James' full name here], you're planning on marrying me, aren't you?"

"I am."

"Well, all righty then..."

We were so in trouble that Sunday in November, we didn't even know it.

Happy almost one-month anniversary, love.

my peeps.

2010-09-13T22:12:00.000-07:00

there was this girl, jenny, whom I used to teach with, and i remember getting into one of those lunchtime conversations: she'd boasted in a delightfully i've-got-a-secret-that-you-want-to-know sort of way that she'd married the same man three times. the table was transfixed and slightly ill-at-ease all at the same time, as you hear those stories of love and marriage and divorce and remarriage when the identical twins reunite at summer camp and then switch places, forcing their parents to meet up again and fall in love .... starring Haley Mills and Haley Mills. But somehow Jenny had managed to meet and marry the same man three times in real wedding and civic wedding and fake wedding sort of way.

I was always jealous of that - i mean, i hadn't even had one wedding, and here she was able to stump all of us with three weddings under her belt. so my competitive self is glad that i'm catching up to jenny with two weddings under my belt, as of yesterday.

we had a young life wedding, and the one word I've used to describe it is endearing. it was endearing to have our family of parents and kids, leaders and committee, and other friends of young life surround james and me with just as much enthusiasm and heart as august 21st. tears were shed, snorts were had, christ was present and we felt renewed and believed in and fully supported, both in ministry and personally. i loved it when alan, our friend and 63-ish year old leader, asked who gives this woman to this man. All the young life kids were standing up front with james and me - the guys on james' side, and the ladies on mine - and those young men looked at each other and bellowed, WE DO! with all the gusto they could manage.

it was delightful and utterly heartwarming all at the same time.

it's funny, because as we were talking about what this day would be like, it's almost like we felt like we were chalking up a mark on the chalkboard of good deeds. the wedding on the 21st was about us, but this, this day was for everyone else - for those friends whom you associate with in all things of the heart ministry-wise, but they don't really know you. they're not really "your people."

I was wrong.

they are my people.

they do know me.

this day was for them, but it was for us as well. these are my everyday people. i may not be pouring out my guts to the teenage boys proudly standing up there next to james, but week in, week out, we're seeing the ups and downs in each other's lives. we're seeing when we're tired and when we're celebratory; we're seeing each other when we've had a hard day, and when we can't seem to get out of the sludge our feet are stuck in.

these are my people.

and I embrace that which is before me.

I nabbed myself a hot guy.

2010-09-09T07:59:00.000-07:00

As per what often happens with dogs, if you're (ie: the human) a social creature, then interactions with other humans and their canines ensue. We've begun to get into the dog-walking rhythms of the day, doing the loop around Brisbane morning and evening with Mr. Darcy (plus a run with his dad if he's lucky). Whilst beginning the walk last night, we happened upon a favorite friendly neighbor and his dog.

"Hey!" (me)

"So, how's it going?" (him)

"Good, good, just walkin'" (as you can see, the conversation was well on its way towards greatness).

"So, when's the wedding?"

"Oh, we actually got married a couple of weeks ago!"

"Well, congratulations!"

"Thanks!"

Pause...awkward silence...does he know who I am?

"I'm Cara - I married James; we live at the end of the street."

"Oh yes, yes - he's the .... " Another pause.

My thoughts: oh...the white male doesn't know how to say "black man." That's okay. I'll break the silence and the racial barriers, and put the words in his mouth for him.

"...black guy?"

"Well yes, but I was going to say HOT GUY!"

Dying, dying. I was dying.

"Yup, I think he's pretty hot too."

Matt* then proceeded to tell me about how he and his partner and the other gay men on our street were so excited to learn that a hot, single man had moved in - but bummer that he's heterosexual!

I'm excited to do dinner with these new friends. Welcome to the neighborhood, welcome to the neighborhood.

lessons learned in 15 days

2010-09-05T21:48:00.000-07:00

James and I have successfully been married for 15 days now. Whew! Here then are 15 things I've learned thus far:

1. When rearranging every cupboard and drawer in (his) house, be sure to tell him where you've organized said things.

2. Remember where you organized such said items, so maybe tie a little string around your finger or something.

3. He will always be cold when he sleeps; you will always be sauna-hot. Sleep in a tank top and don't worry if he steals the covers because you'll still be sweating bullets.

4. Even if you - naturally - wake up before him, he will always get out of bed before you. You like to lay in bed, awake, he likes to spring out of bed, chirping.

5. Just because you're lying in bed awake doesn't mean you want to be alert to the outside world.

6. You'll compromise. A lot. We went out to dinner with a couple from the prayer breakfast (February) who's been married almost 40 years. Dave and Marty's one word of advice? Compromise.

7. For every one picture you take, he'll take 30.

8. For every five books you read, he'll read 1.5. And this isn't a bad thing, he just chews slower, and you digest quickly. (Honeymoon books read: Bittersweet, The Blue Parakeet, The Art of Racing in the Rain, Saving Fish From Drowning and Change of Heart. Currently finishing The Girl Who Play With Fire).

9. This also applies to food. No matter what, you'll finish your meal before him every time.

10. it annoys James when you don't break the label of the wine bottle before opening. You think, why waste time?

11. It annoys you when James doesn't smoosh every item in your kitchen into the dishwasher in order to be more energy-efficicent and green when using the appliance.

12. Say I love you - and mean it - a lot.

13. He wears more sunblock than I do. And he's black. And I'm not. Hmmm.

14. As long as you introduce the word "practical" into your sentence, he'll buy it. This especially works for clothes. Mwah ah ah ah.

15. I really - really, really, really, really - am loving life together.

Bring it.

woo-hoo!

2010-08-23T18:30:00.001-07:00

Hello, my name is mrs. meredith.

and now, back to the honeymoon! (actually, we leave tomorrow, but i feel like I'm not supposed to be having ANY sort of social contact with the outside world, so it's time to go and eat pizza with the HUBS). ps: thanks b-ren for the PERFECT pic!

defying gravity.

2010-08-06T18:05:00.000-07:00

9.30 every friday morning is marked on my calendar with the following: BUTT KICK CARDIO CLASS!!! A few months ago, one of my mommy-friends suggested that I attend the class, with my "flexible schedule and all". Hey, why not, I mean, I go to the Y regularly, I walk Mr. Darcy like my life depended on it, I did Billy Blanks videos 1, 2 and 3 in college - what's another Friday morning class? So I arrived at the Y as per my usual five-minute-late self, walked into the gym, and took a place in the back row.

I couldn't even see the instructor, but I could sort of hear her. What I could see was a look of mean determination on the face of every man and (let's be honest) woman in that room - and I was not up to par, to say the least. Thoughts of Tae-bo are dancing through my head, as I'm remembering how GOOD I was at doing the video with three other girls in our 9 x 12 dorm room in Tinglestad. So what's this class got on me? Everything. Everything.

I somehow made it through the first 45 minutes, a bit red-faced and sweaty, and started patting myself and my teammates on the back: good job, good job. "RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The instructor barks out commands, and quickly everyone gets in formation and starts running laps around the gym. Okay, so maybe this is what we do at the end of Cardio-Kickboxing, I thought to myself, nodding my head of approval to every person I pass, and am subsequently passed by.

Little do I know, but I've entered part two of what I've affectionately come to refer as the BUTT KICK CARDIO CLASS (exclamation points) - because we'd started in on boot camp. Of course. What hour and a half interval wouldn't be complete without an added 45 minutes of boot camp?

The instructor continued to bark. I started to lag, lag, lag behind as I realized that I'd about reached my game at the height of my jab-jab-kick combination. "GET TO THE WALL!!" she screams. So get I got. And she begins to demonstrate these push-ups that were not your normal push-ups, but with your hands on the ground your feet got up ON the wall. So I'm trying my hardest, but every time my feet go up, my hands start slowly sliding forward - with the sweat from the previous hour and 15 minutes of ridiculousness. The instructor comes up to me: "you're not doing it right." "really?" (I suppose I didn't sound so sarcastic at that moment, though my heart wanted to deal her one of those blows she taught me how to throw just an hour earlier). "You have to go like this..." And she begins to do her non-sweaty hand my-whole-body's-like-a-feather push-up against the wall. I looked at her and sneered.

Soon the class was over. Soon I was walking out of there drippier than the faucet that drives you crazy when you're trying to fall asleep. And I vowed never to unleash another 15,000 calories on that Friday morning again.

But I found myself there this morning.

And I found myself kicking butt.

And I was still glaring at the instructor who's able to show me up like there's no tomorrow with her gravity-defying push-ups.

But I also walked out right as the ants began to march around the gym in their running position. I think I won.

building 555

2010-08-04T09:27:00.000-07:00

this morning james and i arrived at the san mateo county courthouse at 8 am on the dot to apply for our marriage license. we met up at peet's at 7.30 to grab his regular drip and my white chocolate americano with room, and I was reminded of his chipper early-morning being and my I-don't-naturally-awake-to-the-world-till-9 self. [after working not more than 3 early morning shifts at starbucks in college, management finally took the early morning reigns away from me because of lack of productivity during the 4 am shift. "What?! i'm not allowed to drink my latte behind the counter? well, forget it!" so, i became the night-shift girl].

after grabbing the necessary energy juice, we found ourselves moseying over to building 555, and second (!) in line, after filling out our online application, we came face to face with the kindest grandma-like processor of our marriage proposal. She complimented us on smiling on our driver's licenses, and on smiling to each other, and on smiling to her - "you seem happy!" she squealed. "Well, isn't everyone?" "no...."

interesting.

interesting.

it's an exciting time, to say the least, and as the future mrs. meredith-to-be, i desire to choose joy. i desire to smile, lots. i desire to not let the silly big and little details of the wedding take over, but instead relish the present moment of standing in line at the courthouse, putting our right hands up and being prompted to say yes. So yes. Yes, yes, yes. To learning how to love each other more, to being each other's biggest fans; to cleaning out our respective houses and making room for each other, physically and emotionally; to living simply, choosing instead to hunker down with love.

that's not exactly what she asked us, but that's the yes i give anyway.

a potential look for the wedding....

2010-07-28T09:52:00.001-07:00

I just asked gracie (future hair and make-up wedding artist) and james (future hubs!) if I should do my hair like this for the wedding:

it's a possibility.

Oh, YL camps....

man, that's just crazy!

2010-07-27T21:13:00.000-07:00

this afternoon a high school buddy and I took a trip to the mall, among other fun n exciting afternoon activities. After stopping by Hotdog on a Stick's $1 Tuesday corn dog specials (of which the future bride did not partake, sad face) and grabbing lemonades instead, we passed by Crate and Barrel.

"Oh, that's where we're registered at!" I said excitedly.

"registered? what does that mean?" So I then began the process of -trying- to explain what it means to register for a wedding:

*it's like your best Christmas present wish list at age 12 come true.
*it's like you tell your mom and dad that you really, really, really want a puppy for your birthday and they actually get it for you.
*it's what people are supposed to do. I mean, it's just what you do. You buy them dinner and invite them to your party, and they bring a present.

As we're then walking through Crate and Barrel, I'm showing Keisa some of our items: "you mean people BUY you this stuff?"

"Yeah!"

"And how much do you have to pay to get this?"

"nothing! people just do it for you! it's the best thing ever!"

"man, that's just crazy!"

Indeed, this whole idea of registering, it's crazy! don't get me wrong - I'm sure back in the day before registries existed there was a use for five Crock Pots, four Betty Crocker cookbooks, and 12 hot plates. But now-a-days, I can technically say I just want one, and I might just get one!

---

In all seriousness, it's been a little overwhelming - in a really, really good way. I know that it's my 'time," and when I attended countless showers and weddings, that it was pure joy to give a gift. it was fun, it was a blessing from me to the person receiving it. But now that it's reversed, I'm having a hard time all the way accepting that this gift is the same....that the same heart desires to give back to me what I've given to them. And that's just weird. That's just a little crazy, as Keisa would say.

But I think i'll be okay with it in the long run. :)

we've been in camp mode. we've been in wedding mode.

2010-07-26T22:56:00.001-07:00

and that....is my excuse. But if you haven't seen the engagement picture slideshow, feel free to indulge here.

the thread of recent conversation.

2010-06-09T22:25:00.000-07:00

My conversations as of late seem to be revolving around this single thread: transition. And life is full of them. As of late, I've been struck with the transition in moving from being a single, independent adult to a married, dependent-in-a-good-way partner. Not that engagement makes me feel like I'm in that weird middle spot, but I do feel like I'm in that place of transition. James and I were both laughing and lamenting the ever-evolving transition to "couplehood": no longer is my inbox full of evite and facebook invitations to this 75+ party and that, but instead emails circulate as to couple dinner dates and Friday night game nights. Apples to Apples, or Settlers of Cattan? What shall it be, folks?

It's been stark, to say the least, and has hit me abruptly - but though the massive friends list may be decreasing, I feel like I'm - like we're - trading it in for something better. It's that which everyone at the Saturday night party craves, even with all the single-minded, feminine streaks we possess: we long and we yearn for intimacy. We want to be known, loved and understood. We all had our little "beep beep! Is THIS the one?" radars on and collection of men to fall back on in our hoppers. but now I've got the one. and there is no back-up hopper plan.

So as James and I step into marriage in just a couple months, we're excited to hunker down and be each other's #1 fans - and with such a statement, it does mean that naturally we're easing ourselves out of that arena. But I don't lightly brush it off with an "out with the old, and in with the new" mentality: there is a mourning process that goes on. A well-loved and celebrated season of the past 10 years post-college is coming to a close, and I don't want to then become one of those married women who forgets what it was like being single, thoughtlessly peering past the person's eyes, wondering why they're too not married yet.

Because there's not a recipe, or an order, or a formula that works.

That I'm finding out with relationships, with life, with jobs and ministry, with it ALL. But sometimes I do wish for an inbox full of evite invitations, just for old time's sake.

is it illegal....

2010-06-07T13:00:00.000-07:00

to save money on return address labels, with the following pre-emptive strike?

(except, FYI, it didn't exactly say "Mr. and Mrs. Robert Smith"...

Heh heh heh.

Here's my thought: we didn't buy the super fancy-dancy invitations that come with an embossed return address label, so one had to be purchased. We're for the most part paying for the wedding, so it had to come from us...and given my cheap Scottish roots, I justified an early "Mr. and Mrs. James Meredith" stamp.

We really didn't get hitched at city hall.

And I could have added an "established 8.21.10," but that would have cost at least $2 more! So, reduce, reuse, recycle, we have justifiably arrived at the answer.

Your thoughts?

go green!

2010-05-25T15:44:00.001-07:00

while visiting the northwest last month, James took this rather GREEN pic of me. Green jacket, green grass, green trees. Hey, they do what they can in Seattle.

The most eco-savvy friends I know, Jer and Care (who even make their own LAUNDRY DETERGENT - I mean, that's green!) recently had a baby. Just in case they'd decided to, I don't know, go orange or something after Saige's birth, I sent them that eco-savvy pic to encourage them to continue in their green-ness. And Saige's response?

Of course she's green! She was practically born that way - in a completely rosy pink baby sort of way, I say.

i cook, therefore I am...

2010-05-23T21:45:00.000-07:00

I'll admit, having someone to cook for makes me want to cook just an eensy weensy bit more. I wouldn't say that I'm at the point of cooking being a form of relaxation (and if that is you, please explain to me how balancing timers and ingredients and measuring cups and hot stoves is relaxing! stress says me!) - but James and I are loving going through cookbooks to see what sparks our tastebud's interests. here's what i've learned:

1. this, as we had for dinner tonite was YUMMY. and even if the sauce ends up soupier rather than saucier, james still thinks it's the best thing since sliced bread. In fact, he's excited to dip such sliced bread into its leftovers.

2. I'm a bit of a reduce-reuse-recycle kind of girl...for instance, no food should go to waste, and it's easy for me to get over-zealous in my grocery shopping and purchase food that I end up throwing out. So, what's on tap this week in the CROCK POT because there is a huge excess of celery? this.

3. Chorizo is not a vegetable. and you should find that out before heading to safeway and asking the "nice" mama with a baby.

4. I still have to look up how to properly hard-boil an egg: do I boil the water first, and then drop the egg in? is the egg in there from the beginning? and for how long? See, it's times like these that typing in "how to boil an egg" into google's search engine is quite handy.

5. you really can get by in life without a microwave. i'm (by choice, mind you), going on 9 months now, and life is still grand and relatively radio-active free.

6. No matter what the food, mr. darcy begins to beg the minute I step foot into the kitchen. Okay, so he's a dog, that's a no brainer.

7. Now let's say you decide to get creative with your coffee in the morning, and you think to yourself, "...self....what if you made this toasted coconut coffee. you sure would be a superstar." And then you put said coconut into the toaster oven, and put it on "toast," naturally. Well, you might just catch the coconut, the pan, and the oven on fire. Be careful what you wish for, little girl.

8. Bisque requires a blender. if you don't have a blender, you'll have chowder, and really, the man will still like your soup! (and also, if you don't have a blender, that's what wedding registries are for!)

9. People will still talk about chicken and waffles long after your engagement wears off. it's a delectable treat, and a must-have for future parties. (note: in case you don't know what i'm talking about, we had a chicken and waffles engagement party. YUM-MY!).

10. So, josh and brenda, I guess I've come along way since MFCB: my first cookbook.

3 things I kind of secretly wish in my head. by cara.

2010-05-17T18:17:00.000-07:00

1. why can't a bride, or even a bridesmaid, walk down the aisle with a big ol' fat BIRDS OF PARADISE flower? I mean, they're confident, they're uniquely beautiful and they scream, "look at me!" - even if they're prone to poking an eye or two out.

2. One more wedding note: I secretly wish for COWGIRL boots, for all the ladies! Actually, I did slightly propose this, and my sister quickly vetoed it. But how rad would that be? And who cares if I have not an inkling of actual cowgirl in me, although I have recently become obsessed with The Pioneer Woman, and am crossing my fingers that perhaps James will take to raising cattle and wild horses one of these days.

3. no such thing as 7 am meetings: oftentimes I give workin' folk the option of a morning, noon or night meeting, after all, I am the one with the flexible schedule. But when they take me up on the 7 am meeting, I mean, really folks! I think the world would be a much happier place if we all slept in everyday until 8 am and began our workday at 10. It's just a proposal. [Side note: because here I am at noon-thirty, having already had four meetings this morning. What is this crazy productivity?]

The list goes on: I secretly wish for a constant caffeine injection, for flexible poses during yoga so that the instructor doesn't have to call me stiff-bones, for a million dollars, for a Subaru Outback, for my very own tropical island named Caramer. The end.

add a caption

2010-05-09T17:14:00.000-07:00

I think this is the most serious-looking picture I've ever taken; let's play 'add a caption' to this sun-beaming pic.

apparently...

2010-05-02T19:19:00.001-07:00

I've got wedding on the mind - but I swear there's more to this girl than burdensome guest lists and coconut cupcakes! But since we're on the topic, might I present this sassy little number for the ladies standing up there near me:

*Sweet sassy molassy Marilyn dress.

Otherwise, we had a "meet the fiance" weekend up in Washington - I'm still here, sitting in my sister's living room, while the man flew back to the land of sunshine this afternoon. We did have a fabulous little laugh over this memory with The Millerhood last night:

*Why you men and women should always choose single-person kayaks by Cara, Josh and Brenda.

I feel full, in a good, completely soul sort of way.

i don't like...

2010-04-26T22:43:00.001-07:00

*narrowing down a wedding list.
*picking and choosing between what I like to call everyone: FRIEND.
*thinking about who pursues me and who I pursue (which has been the separating factor).
*realizing what relationships are just ministry-lationships, and which are friend-lationships.
*the fact that i'm not okay with this thing called the guest list thus far.

I hear that the guest list is the HARDEST part. I hear that you have to just do it. I hear that there might be regrets on those whom you don't invite. I want everyone to feel like an A+ superstar, and not a B-list video rental.

So, ending on a positive note:

I DO like...

*the reality of ELATION that exists over this event!
*a fiance who still loves me even when I get frustrated over the guest list and have to call a conversation quits because i'm just fed up.
*feeling celebrated.
*seeing all the pieces of the puzzle come together rather quickly. Let's be honest: by the time you're 31, have been to a ba-jillion weddings, and been in 10+ weddings, you know what you want (and don't want) in a wedding. Photographer - check. Cake woman - check. Hot black man to be the future husband - check. Oh wait...

On another note, the YL kids stole my phone tonite and texted James with the following: "I miss u babyyy... Love u sooo much." Really, he didn't know any better (although I hope he questioned the grammar) - BUT since they also decided to text the OTHER James in my phone - ie: the 7th grade BOY I read with every Wednesday morning!!! - well, that wasn't so easy to explain. Here's to YL kids showing their love through the illegal.

love, peace, weddings and horrid texts- chm.

windrider this weekend in MP

2010-04-05T22:19:00.001-07:00

It's a shameless plug for an AWESOME event: the Windrider Forum is coming to Menlo Park! if you're in the YAY AREA, then join them this coming weekend...including the opp to meet MARK RUFFALO!

Here are details from an email I just received:

Thursday, April 8th We open with an informal presentation with Ralph Winter and Chap Clark followed by the Priddy Brothers film, AFTER THE STORM, and a Q&A with John Priddy and James Lescene.

(c): Ralph Winter is big time. Chap Clark is smart time. the film After the Storm is amazing - i just wrote a final paper on it.

Friday, April 9th Mark Ruffalo and Christopher Thornton were impacted so profoundly with their Q&A session in our class at that their distribution company pursued us to set up this screening of SYMPATHY FOR DELICIOUS. This is the first time the film has screened since Sundance.

(c): GO SEE THIS AMAZING FILM THIS FRIDAY NIGHT.

Saturday, April 10th Three events are planned. Our Shorts Program in the afternoon, followed by a filmmaker reception, and closing with the 2009 Sundance selection, THE ANSWER MAN with a Q&A session with John Hindman, Director

(c): I really have no comment on the above other than the fact that I'm distributing tickets at 6 pm. :)

---

Windrider Film Forum – Bay Area

April 8-10, 2010

650.321.7444

Tickets: $10 General Admission/$8 Students

(available for pre-purchase online or at the theater prior to the screening)

---

Spread the word and GO!!!

plus one - they're not just a bad band from 10 years ago

2010-04-04T20:51:00.000-07:00

Back to the list of "do's" and "don'ts" when it comes to a wedding: James was adamant about NOT allowing any "plus one's." I'm like, I hear you - I mean, it really doesn't get any better than insync and backstreet boys, so why try and "christ-i-fy" it by playing music from a horrible Christian boy band? James looked at me. Oh no you didn't.

Plus One: your guest when you are invited to an event. "billy's gonna be my plus-one at jane's party." (urban dictionary, I love you).

Now here's the hard thing: I've been a plus one. I've been a "hecks yes, I deserve an invite to your wedding! I'm coming whether you like it or not!" (Camo, can I be your date please?) I've been that college kid who didn't get an invite to a wedding, but thought I had the "right" to be there because we'd had five or six conversations in our lifetime.

Oh no I didn't! but i did.

So without even bringing up the (very hard task of the!) guest list itself, how does one nicely communicate "no plus ones"? Is plus one inevitable, kind of like requesting absolutely NO kenny g at a wedding and then hearing his saxophone romantically brush the DJ airwaves? (Bennett, you'd better not!) ....or should I take these potential plus one wedding crashers as a compliment of sorts?

will mr. darcy be the ring bearer?

2010-03-31T22:35:00.000-07:00

Now really, people. I know that I love my dog. I know that sometimes I humanize him a bit too much and call him Fitzwilliam and let him cuddle with me. I know that he's been my token side-kick for a good 3.5 years now, and that every good illustrative story at camp involves the little dude. So when I was asked for, oh, the 10th time today whether or not Mr. Darcy would be in the wedding, I really had to take a step back.

These people are serious.

People really do think I'm as obsessed with my dog as, well, someone really obsessive. And am I? (Wait, wait, don't answer that question). I love the little bugger - but there are boundaries, and he's a DOG.

So, a reminder: MD IS A CANINE. He will not be in the wedding, ushering (herding) people down the aisle - he will not be a ring bearer (ie: peeing on the sides of the pretty white chairs), and certainly not be mingling around 200 people, because his limit is, oh, 5 (and let's just refrain from even adding a parenthesis here...). He is a dog, and dogs do not wear clothes.

No, no, no. The dog will be in some undisclosed doggie daycare of a heaven, enjoying his own honeymoon of sorts apart from the wedding madness.

I think. ;)

So please, get the following out of your head:

The ring bearer will instead be played by my lovely friend Claudia with her fluffy feather pillow. Thanks Claud!

and so it begins.

2010-03-24T19:55:00.000-07:00

There is an industry out there known as the BIG DAY. I'm 9 days into the world of engagement and already it's like the wedding world dropped an a-bomb on the front door of my cottage. james and i are committed to the following wedding mantra: stress-free, fun, about the two of us and life together and marriage preparation - and not the $100,000 wedding.

We met on Sunday for our first official "not calling it a meeting marriage preparation" day ... in other words, we met to plan a wedding (shhh! don't tell him I said those words!). I arranged it much like I would if I were preparing talks for a weekend at camp: 1) get a stack of recycled paper (because I'm eco-savvy). 2) at the top of each page, write a different theme; for instance, "DREAMS," "do's", "don'ts", "setting," "pastor," "FINANCIALS" (ack!), etc. The "do's" were not then about the vows, but about what we've seen in other weddings that we like.

So, on the do's list:

*Marvin Gaye (J)
*a weekend of festivities (C)

Don'ts:

*no line dancing (J) - bummer! ;)
*no Ephesians 5 (C)

And the list goes on...I suppose this is why you're supposed to buy a wedding planning book, but I haven't gotten that far and am okay with it.

In the meantime, I'm still in DREAM phase - and in "how to have a lovely, inexpensive, fabulous, posh" wedding phase as well. Here are some ideas thus far:

*flowers: go to the farmer's market the morning of. Done.

*centerpieces: put said flowers in mason jars. fill with water.

*DJ: honor a friend who's good at music and on a mic, and hand him/her an ipod and the microphone.

*Hair: cross your fingers that a favorite friend/hairdresser will cut you a deal and still make you look pretty since she's coming to the wedding anyway.

*Photography: muy importante. Spend money here. Also beg friends who are good at photography to bring their cameras along and take one billion pictures.

*Venue: Cross your fingers, smile pretty and pray for a venue that's free and that we can fit a big white tent into the backyard of!

*Tables and chairs: see if churches I have a relationship with (through YL) will offer us a few ... or BYOC! I've heard of that - bring your own chair!

*Dessert: 1) BYOD - for all the little old ladies who want to participate, have them bring in a dessert! Potluck dessert at a wedding - yum! (Note: there would only be one "BYO-_______"). 2) Do a nice 6-inch cake for the bride/groom, and then do a cheaper mass production cake for the rest of the peeps. 3) Hire Jenn Lopez to make hoards of cupcakes.

*Food: MUY IMPORTANTE - we want this day to be a gift to everyone involved, so if they're showing up, they're eating! We'd like to do a SOUTHERN meal in honor of James' heritage: fried catfish, hush puppies, cornbread and greens, anyone? next question: does anyone know of a cheap but good private caterer who'd like to cater our wedding with such food?

*Drink: yes. Hopefully we'll be able to have a location in which we can bring in our own beer/wine.

*Date: WE DON'T HAVE ONE, FOLKS. I know that with summer vacations and such, inquiring minds want to know - but we don't know yet. I'll say it's our goal by April 15th - how 'bout that?

*Special friends, bridesmaids, flower girls, etc - still deciding how to honor dear friends.

*Wedding planner: it's me, it's me! DREAM BIG and have monthly crafting parties. :)

WHEW!

I'm glad for websites like this one here and that one there that give me hope...and now, stress-free, let that be me!

name that tune

2010-03-17T22:58:00.000-07:00

today's post is song-lyric inspired:

1. "If you like it you'd better put a ring on it..."
2. "Ebony and ivory live together in perfect harmony...
3. "Girl, you know it's true..."
4. "Let's get together, yea yea yea" (that's for all the Parent Trap starring Haley Mills and Haley Mills fans out there).
5. "A Whole New World..."

That's right - a whole new carpet ride is in store....James and Cara are engaged!

A lot can happen over the course of fall and winter. :)

call me medium tall.

2010-03-09T22:12:00.000-08:00

This afternoon I went to Target to buy a pair of brown tights, and found myself staring at the two size selections: S/M and M/T. Small-medium: dream as I might, I'm just not that lithe 7th grader I once was - and medium-tall: well, last time I checked I wasn't sporting Julia Roberts' 44 inch legs. So where then is the M/L? I sort through both rows: I reorganize both rows: and no M/L is to be found. Well, could I be a S/M then? My mind is churning, wondering if the latest step aerobics regime really is doing the trick. But would a pair of long tights really be a bad thing? I reach for the package, and it's then that I see that these ARE the two available sizes. Target, in all its marketing brilliance, has realized that no woman wants to be called "large" - no, just label her tights as Tall! I'm a medium-tall!

The point (which I came to realize tonite at my monthly spiritual direction retreat): there are things in my life that I disguise and label as M-T, even when they're clearly a M-L. I think about the area of giftedness: every single one of us is gifted in some way, and those are gifts that are SO unique to our own personhood and being. But oftentimes those gifts go awry. They're used in the wrong way. They become mislabeled. The gift of the people who surround us merely become a means to the end - you have what I need. A gift that uses a platform, that of speaking or writing or music, becomes a way to achieve praise and admiration. Instead of the gift being used in pure service, of an honest heart, it gets disguised as a M-T, instead of just letting it be the old M-L that it is.

Sometimes this is just the way an analogy works in my head.

books: past and present

2010-02-23T00:12:00.001-08:00

I am not at all complaining about Sundance - but I will say that I've been craving sitting down in front of the heater and holing up with a good book more than normal ... so much so that in the past week and a half I've finished four books and am now sifting through another stack. Mmmm. Did I ever mention that I can't just read one book? I have my genres. So first, the finished:

*The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo: fun little Swedish murder mystery but the author who seemed to gain fame upon his death before the third of the trilogy was completed. I will say that reading book #2 is a viable option...

*Culture Making: This I "had" to read for my recent Fuller (ie: SUNDANCE) class, and it was good, but not my favorite (at least of the four recent reads). It's simply looking at the intersection of faith and culture, and how as and because God's created each of us individually and uniquely that he can and will use those as we become future makers of culture.

*Clinging: WOW. This was a book we "had" to read for Soul Care (a spiritual direction program I get to participate in this year), but I'm telling you for an easy, soul-filling, honest, short book on prayer, this is it.

*Jesus Through Middle Eastern Eyes: Now, truth be told, I've been trying to sift through this for the past year, so though that doesn't sound very good, this book is AMAZING! It's by a professor who spent 30 years in the Middle East, so KNOWS the culture. So many of our stories about Jesus stem from our own westernized interpretations - and he sets the story straight. I used it in quite a few preparations for speaking this year - it's that good!

So indeed, now the books that I'm slowly sifting through:

*The morning read: BeautyI love the mystic picture of beauty that's holy, that's real, that's present, and that's right there for me to grasp.

*The coffee shop read: God and the Rhetoric of Sexuality. Recommended by my friend Jamie whose getting her degree in counseling at Mars Hill Graduate School, this book looks at the truth of, well, God, and what he thinks about, well, sexuality. I love that it's continuing to break up some of the myths I've latched onto in/from the church.

*The BART read: The Witch of Portobello. I'm a big Paulo Coelho fan simply because I like that he makes me think outside the box. Even if I don't 100% agree with his spiritual beliefs portrayed through some of his characters, I like that he makes me think and realize that I've got a box. And he's a beautiful writer. Mmm.

*The bed-time read: The Family. I'll be honest: I was dying to read this after a week at the prayer breakfast, after and while friends have been and are involved with the Fellowship, after recent NPR specials. I appreciate that it's written from an outsider's perspective, but I have to also realize that it's written from an outsider's perspective, and hold its "truth" loosely.

*The work-out read: Incarnate Leadership. This is another "have to" read for Young Life, but I'm enjoying it, and getting a good sweat on at the same time. This idea I love: leaders are not supposed to be up on a pedestal, but down in the trenches. I think it's too easy as leaders within our communities (or wherever we find ourselves) to assume that we can only be real with those who "really" get us. But was that Christ's model? I'm gaining new perspective, and loving it.

And now, with Paul Potts singing to me in the background, it's time to go grab the bed-time read and skee-daddle!

words at the NPB (National Prayer Breakfast), #1

2010-02-16T13:59:00.000-08:00

...from our President:

“[L]et us be guided by our faith, and by prayer. For while prayer can buck us up when we are down, keep us calm in a storm; while prayer can stiffen our spines to surmount an obstacle -- and I assure you I'm praying a lot these days -- prayer can also do something else. It can touch our hearts with humility. It can fill us with a spirit of brotherhood. It can remind us that each of us are children of an awesome and loving God."

I am unashamedly a big fan of Obama, and will proclaim it without regret, including the fact that it would have been a tough climate for any presidential candidate to step into. And as his many critics attacked his lack of experience, this little paragraph above reminded me (and others in the room, regardless of political affiliation) that humility has smacked him in the face. So I love his words: we are to be guided by our faith, and through that faith, in relational connection with God. Prayer gives us hope, as we place our trust in a greater good, in the unexpected outcome, in that which we do not know. We are given peace in the midst of storms. And realizing that God's a wee bit bigger than us, we humbly step into community with one another, knowing that as children we all sit at the feet of a loving Father.

I am encouraged that this man leads our nation.

Encouraged.

a quick recap

2010-02-14T23:42:00.001-08:00

....went to high school camp, January 22-24. Probably looked like this the whole time:

Stress-free, that's me? ;)

...traveled to the Sundance Film Festival, watched 11 full-length films and participated in the Windrider Forum. I am still processing big-time the intersection of faith and film (and, for that matter, doing classwork). BUT, among the people highlights, lizzy and I got to hang out for the week:

And so did mark ruffalo and I. How do you like me NOW?!

...then hopped on a plane to DC for the National Prayer Breakfast, and again, am enjoying having the weekend to relax so that further processing can happen. Though we weren't of course allowed to take pictures, it brought tears to my eyes to be in the same ROOM as the Obamas. WOW. Hillary Rodham Clinton gave the keynote address, and that was powerful. So we went from faith and film to faith and politics - culture colliding with Christ, though not ever the way I assumed it'd be.

I thought I'd get more "shaking hands and kissing babies" pictures, but alas, most of the picture memories came from jaunts out and about town. One afternoon was quite memorable after arriving at National Cathedral having just taken an emergency "Holy &*$#! I can't hold it!" pee stop on the side of Massachusetts Avenue. So far I haven't received any tickets in the mail, but did manage to snap a couple of pretty pics:

And then of course, as much of the world knows, I'd planned to see James and MEET THE FAMILY down in Florida for the shuttle launching but got SNOWED IN, blizzard-style. Since joy comes in the morning, realizing that out of our group of 15, 9 of us were stuck, we decided to make lemons out of lemonade....er snowballs out of snow? We made do:

Dave and Siv (the couple above) gained a roomie as they let me tuck a roll-away into their odd-shaped hotel room. They made the holed-up, bummed-to-not-be-in-FL weekend lovely.

And now, I'm home....woohoo!

butch cassidy and the sundance kid

2010-01-09T11:24:00.000-08:00

Butch Cassidy: How long before you figure they're not after us?
Sundance Kid: A while longer.
Butch Cassidy: How come you're so talkative?
Sundance Kid: Naturally blabby, I guess.

It's not that we've got the wild west a chasin' us, but the upcoming adventures of Lizzy and Cara could naturally resonate with these characters (and dang that I've already labeled myself the naturally blabby one!)

(Lizzy and I last year in Colorado, taking separate Fuller intensive courses).

On January 25th, dear friend Lizzy and I join forces at the Sundance Film Festival for a Fuller (Seminary) Theology and Film class. Am I excited? YES. Am I hoping to score one of those fabulous $800 celebrity goodie bags, but am unable at this point to decide which celebrity I could pass for? Unfortunately, yes. This past week we submitted our top 11 films we'd like to see, as tickets were then lottery-style picked and accounted for. We didn't get everything we were hoping to see, but I'm stoked regardless. Here are a couple I'm stoked about seeing:

Welcome to the Rileys... A dark comedy masked within the confines of a dysfunctional family setting - what could be better?

Holy Rollers... I'll admit it: extreme cultures, especially from that which are religiously-driven, intrigue me. So here you have the Hasidic Jewish community caught between the ideals of faith and culture in the midst of drug trafficking? It doesn't get much better than that.

What an adventure, opportunity and once-in-a-lifetime experience January 25th-31st will be!

new years, resolutions, all-city YL, and how they all fit together

2010-01-04T22:18:00.000-08:00

The new year is upon us, and whether our new year's resolution is to write more blogs, to work out more, to lose weight, to eat all the food in our fridge (that really is a good one for me - hence, today I made apple salsa!), or to simply to NOT have a resolution, each one of us still finds ourselves entering into 20-10 whether we're ready for it or not. This past year (old) roommate Jeannie and I giddily gloated at having a new year's eve date and kiss that wasn't someone we randomly grabbed on the streets of Pac Ave in Santa Cruz. But I digress... And this year's January 1 brought with it further days of rest and reflection for me personally, along with thoughts about what's in store in the year to come.

Moving forward, I spoke tonite at all-city Young Life, which is an event we started this year as outreach for local churches while essentially providing critical mass for YL on Monday nights. And tonite's talk was about just this: resolutions. We step into these resolutions wanting to better ourselves, desiring to slip off that of last year that didn't go so well. And for many of us, 2009 was a year that many soon want to leave behind: job loss, debt, divorce, singleness, infertility, death, illness - those were just a few that seemed to hit me (and someone I know) personally. It's natural to then want to leave it behind and step into the new year.

And of course there was a spiritual parallel, which I'm curious to see whether or not is agreed upon or not; years ago I read a line in a Max Lucado book that stuck out to me like a sore thumb: "God loves you just the way you are, BUT he refuses to let you stay that way. He wants to make you more like his son, Jesus Christ." Sometimes I struggle with this thought knowing that the "but" of the sentence exists, so how can there be a "but" in grace? But the but remains: he wants me to be like Jesus. Maybe, just maybe, as I move into the new year, as I leave behind the things of 2009 and step forward into twenty-ten, I also do so knowing that Christ wants to know me that much more intimately...that much more deeply. And he wants me to be more like him.

So this isn't a blog to then pastor everyone, and say, "well, what are you doing for JESUS this year?!" (emphasis on Jesus, like I'm a southern Baptist preacher), but there is truth in acknowledging the different parts of our being, and perhaps setting goals accordingly: spiritually, mentally, emotionally, intellectually, physically, (though Christ encompasses each part of our being, not just the spiritual).

This was somewhat of what was said tonite - but on a more toned-down, high school-ese level. So happy new year to all, and to all a good night.

peace.

a christmas poem, as such

2009-12-28T22:58:00.000-08:00

Twas a couple days post Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not MD, nor a mouse.
The mini fake trees were plopped on the counter with care
In hopes that the spirit of Christmas would still reside there.

The Young Life kids were all on Facebook in their beds,
While visions of status updates danced in their heads.
And the new beau James in his beanie, and I in my Uggs,
Had just settled our minds for a long winter’s nap.

When out in the kitchen there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the couch to see what was the matter.
Away to the hallway I flew like a flash,
Stepped into the room and nearly took out a lash.

Betty Crocker had been in this kitchen, for sure,
For Cara was cooking, and this we'd have to endure.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But an itty bitty Crock Pot, which we were eating for dinner, my dear!

---

So that is a bit of an update: Christmas came and went - and it was good. James is still great - and all is good. I've actually been cooking - and it's been edible so far (beet salsa for dinner, among other delights). My computer desperately needs a bigger hard drive, so I haven't been able to upload any pics - and therefore haven't been super motivated to write on the blog. So that is it.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

---

James and Cara at a lovely beach restaurant in Half Moon Bay for a friend's birthday.

Hiking a couple months back with MD! (James took the pic)

the holiday season is where?

2009-11-28T22:50:00.000-08:00

It's here.

So weird.

I just returned about 45 minutes ago after a day's worth of shotgunning and driving from San Diego this morning to good-byes with 75 precious new high school friends to a flat tire (of course...) soon thereafter. This high school youth group in walnut creek, CA takes a mission trip down to a place called Rancho de sus Ninos every Thanksgiving break, and I was honored to speak on the trip again this year (as I spoke on it in '04 as well). It was a beautiful week with these friends. My mind is swimming with the immediate of GO TO BED, but I'm also in that quasi-delirious, reflective stage. By far one of my favorite parts was that one of our local YL leaders, and a favorite of mine [okay, I have a lot of favorites - I'll be honest], Juvy, was able to go with me. though i think it was a little harder defining her role, I was blessed to have that #1 companion and friend beside me, as the job of speaker can be rather lonely at times otherwise. But then, truth be told, it's pretty stinkin' awesome to be able to just let go of life back home for a week and just BE ... especially when that "being" involves getting to know teenagers, playing with little mexican orphan and daycare kids, building schtuff, and seeing god in action.

But my thoughts swim as to short-term missions...

does enablement take place within the local culture every time we "rich" americans cross the border, bringing gifts and good tidings of great joy?

where is the long-term investment of relationship in these short-term missions when thousands of people pass through the lives of (these orphans in particular) every year?

what does it mean then to truly serve?

...

I am back to claiming the aforementioned state of delirium - hope ya'll had a happy Thanksgiving - we instead ate steak tacos!

he's kind of my new favorite...

2009-11-28T22:48:00.000-08:00

...and I call him James. :)

the risk of love...

2009-11-12T20:23:00.000-08:00

A spiritual director of mine sent this poem my way, and I stopped dead in my tracks:

The Risk of Love: I John 4:18 (NEB)
by Luci Shaw, from Polishing the Petoskey Stone

The risk of love
is that of being unreturned.

For if I love too deep,
too hard, too long
and you love little
or you love
me not at all
then is my treasure given,
gone,
flown away lonely.

But if you give me back
passion for passion,
return my burning,
add your own
dark fire to flame my heart
then is love perfect

hot, round, augmented,
whole, endless, infinite,
and it is fear
that flies.

---

this poem is beautiful to me. i think of the risk of love with god, and the risk of love with man - both of which i've kept at arm's length because it's safe...because it puts me in control...because I know what to expect. So I find myself at a crossroads in the aforementioned risky business(es) - and am left with realizing that it's just that: a risk without knowing what to expect.

How do I need to risk love?

To whom do I need to risk love with?

and this fear - this fear that so easily entangles me even when I don't even realize it - where does it fly to when it flies away? be gone, fear!

---

Your thoughts on this risky business ... called ... love?

"roommate"

2009-10-29T23:26:00.001-07:00

I'm afraid I'm not always one for originality. As I sat in a meeting today, I just started giggling as I spewed out facts and thoughts and aphorisms and bits of wisdom and realized that NONE of it was my own. So I confess, I'm an unoriginal, plagiarizing, stealer of a, well, creative genius if I do say so myself...which leads us to the main point of this short post: "roommate." The word in itself connotes what two posts ago sought to run far far away from: the 28 previous housemates over the past 12 years of my life. And here my attempts at originality fail me, as I post this picture of a favorite roommate off and on of the past two years, Jeannie Reed. There's a point at which someone moves from a first name to the endearing "roommate" as their name, and Jeannie wears the hat along with other women of glorying fame. But alas, she's roommate of the hour tonite, so this post goes to her. In this pic we celebrated our last night as roomies together by heading to a posh little wine bar in Palo Alto - though I'll miss the everyday interaction with her, we've ironically had better, more intentional and FUN time together as friends-in-separate-houses in the past week. Love you, rooomate!

one of those nights...

2009-10-26T23:08:00.000-07:00

tonite was one of those nights in ministry that just made sense....and I LOVED it. One of my favorite nights of the year has got to be when we (young life) buy out the menu at Taco Bell and just go for it. Thanks to a generous donor who swiped his credit card for $163.74 at the local TB, bags upon bags of greasy, nasty, processed "Mexican" food were consumed - so that ultimately kids could hear about Jesus. I love that kids showed up who hadn't been to YL before, and even though some sat on the sidelines, ultimately laughed and felt like they belonged. I love the leader who gargled hot sauce for 32 seconds just to be "in" with kids (this was after they gargled "Jingle Bells" with the aforementioned hot sauce for 32 seconds, of course). I love the kids CHOWING down on all the food that was left after being broken up into teams to see who could finish the food first. I love the strangers who walked into this restaurant on the corner of El Camino and 20th and just watched what was going on. I love that Juvy, one of our leaders, talked about the fact that Jesus cares about the heart...that it's the most important part - and that most of those strangers seemed to walk in at 8.47 pm when she was giving the talk. Would the paralyzed man have eaten Taco Bell with Jesus? I think so! I love that two friends of Young Life, Annie and Gilbert, refused to leave before the last kid did, and were determined to leave Taco Bell cleaner than they found it. I love that the Taco Bell employees, though sweaty at the end of the evening, waved good-bye to us and thanked us for being there.

It was a GREAT evening.

yo quero taco bell.

all by myself

2009-10-20T09:14:00.000-07:00

Right before I moved up to Washington in '05 I'd just finished watching every episode of Sex & the City starring my favorite shoe-hoarding Carrie Bradshaw (otherwise known as Sarah Jessica Parker). With her three best friends, they individually conquered the Big Apple in a unique way: through career, through love, through fame, through money, through family ... and the list goes on. They'd leave their quirky little apartments and meet up for a cosmo or a Saturday morning breakfast, and for the most part, were portrayed as successful, confident women who together could do anything.

Fast forward: I always wondered how they lived alone - all by themselves in the big city. I, on the other hand, have always been surrounded by roommates; granted, there have been two stints of living in separate family units, one up in Washington, and one down here in California, but for the most part, I realize that I have always - always, always, always - been surrounded by housemates. And to tell you the truth, college summers excluded (because with Frontier Ranch or Young Life in the midst, that'd just be over the top), my rough estimate is in the range of 28...or 33. [what do we do with the Gordon House conundrum? To say there was a steady stream of five or six is an understatement.]

In the midst of the usual this week (working, kid hang out dates - don't you love that that's not work to me? :) - reading and writing a paper for class, going on a million walks a day with MD, working out...), I also find myself packing up and getting ready to move three miles south on Saturday. And this place, or "the cute little cottage," as I've deemed it, is PERFECT. How excited I am to have a little place to call my own, in addition to having a great yard and another playmate named Chase (in the front house) for Mr. Darcy. And I don't know if hitting 30 just gave me the magical push of confidence to go out and live on my own, or if the above 28 co-habitants just made me desirous of some down time, but I'm doing it! And I'm excited! I think part of it is that ministry here on the Peninsula feels like it's finally taking off, so it's busy. And at the end of the day, having been a professional hanger-outer, I desire some down time. I want to read that stack of books. I want to sip that vino and watch netflix. And sometimes I just want to turn off.

So that, my friends, is what I'm doing. And I can't wait! With it comes more intentionality on my part, but with it also comes an eventual dose of knowing thyself - and for that, I can't wait.

another hard but good

2009-09-24T21:18:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I covet sitting in the hard stuff, as icky and sucky as it is. Sometimes I automatically roll my eyes when there's always a positive spin on the end of a hard tale of woe - though I do it myself much of the time...so, as our mantra here with young life in the mid-peninsula has been to be ENCOURAGED by what we do see instead of DISCOURAGED by what we don't see, I choose both...

Hard: learning that the statute of limitations was up on my accident from 2.5 years ago, and that they never received my signed documents this summer, so the case is closed. I'm out $3500 owed to me. Grrr. Jesus, will you grow a tree of 3500 other blessings?

Good: I spoke about Young Life in the ministry spotlight at a church on Sunday, and we had almost 30 responses from folks wanting to get involved on various levels!

Hard: the girl who was going to move into my spot in the house had to back out on Tuesday...when will I get to move into the cute little cottage with Mr. Darcy?

Good: I'll still be moving into this cute little cottage with Mr. Darcy. I'm SO excited to live by myself, to live in this backyard place with Mr. Darcy who will have a HUGE yard and another pup named Scout to play with!

Hard: I'm tired and ready for vacay.

Good: I just had an EXCELLENT vacay last month in St. Simons, Georgia - oh to relax on the beach, to read, to sleep, to laugh, to converse, to eat buttery, greasy southern food...

With my friend Claudia from here in SM who took me to her southern homeland!

With college roommate Mandy who happened to be staying 10 minutes away that same weekend I was there!

Okay. Now I'm done....hard but good: that's life. that's life.

just a few pics

2009-09-02T22:28:00.000-07:00

Some of life in a nutshell:

My younger sister Aleah got married in August! With sister-in-law and brother, Melissa and Brandon...

And, is he NOT the cutest nephew in America? Balloon-play with Jared Christopher...

Congrats Aleah and Mikey (who are, as we speak, enroute from Dublin!)

My friend Claudia joined me for a little Oregon-California road trip heading back down south; on the way we decided to take a little detour in Brownsville (OR), and stumbled upon the 2nd annual Stand By Me festival! Who knew? And though most of you know, autographs are being given out for our dunce-like appearance in the Oregonian.

Fall, here we come!

writing. period.

2009-09-02T21:22:00.001-07:00

I've started writing again - apparently facebook status updates just aren't cutting it. Rewind to last November: hailed by friends and family as pure insanity, I signed up for NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writers Month). 3 days and 4000 words into it, I quickly realized that this dream wasn't going to be accomplished. So here the dream book comprised of a little bit of story time, wit, intelligence, Jesus, nature, love, laughter (Anne Lamott, Annie Dillard and Frederick Buechner all rolled into one) saw its sad demise onto the back burner of my desktop.

But along came Monday. And Monday evening I found myself on a plane, situated next to Carlos the wine distributer and BB the mysterious Silicon Valley clone and author of "Boys Are Stupid."

"Why is that the title of your book?"

"Well, because I have a philosophy: boys are stupid and girls are crazy." BB decided to write a book for his beloved goddaughter upon her coming of age into teenage-dome.

"But how did you ever get it published?"

"Lulu.com. It's a self-publisher."

So there you go, friends and family, inspired by BB, last night's vision of this year's Christmas presents (watch out, Martha - I've got my own handy craft!), I am back on the bandwagon writing again.

Current wordcount: 4,344.

Any bets on how long this current excitement will last?

no more camping!

2009-07-27T16:04:00.000-07:00

...no, this does not refer to the pitch-age of tent - you KNOW i'm going to continue doing that....but as of today, cara's young life summer camping season is OVER! it's easy for a YL summer to last 6-7 weeks away from the area (ie: where I live), but with only a two week assignment and one week at woodleaf, high school camp, I am DONE! That is huge! Here then is the plan for the rest of the summer:

this week: REST. big time. i can't even get off the couch right now and I LOVE it.

saturday: scotty and annie's wedding in tahoe
sunday: drive north
monday: drive north
sunday, august 9th: aleah's wedding in WA
august 15th-ish....make my way south.

august 27th: take a REAL five-day vacation to a little island off the coast of GEORGIA (yes, america) with my friend Claudia! Put Mr. Darcy up in a doggie-hotel! Turn off the cell phone, leave the laptop at home, lay on the beach, read five books, eat well, drink well, rest well, laugh hard and have a merry old time! in the meantime, here are some pics:

this was from a fundraising event we did for young life in june called CAMPNAPPING where adults in the community got "kidnapped," and had to raise bail. fabulous friends Raven and Kiara helped kidnapped Cathy, one of the adults with me, and were SO scared that we ourselves were going to get arrested. No way man.

my assignment this summer was speaking to middle school kids for three-five day sessions at camp maymac in santa cruz. As usual, it was a growing time, but I LOVED it. for more stories, just ask. :)

this was the "door" illustration i used for all of the talks...here, the work crew and summer staff (high school and college volunteers) had placed "before Christ" words that they thought of themselves as on the door to signify NEED. Oftentimes, in trying NOT to then feel that way about ourselves, we try and solve the problem on our own...we slam the door shut, and we put a big "keep out" sign on the door towards Jesus.

here's billy and reylon, two friends from maymac, whom I took for the day, touring north of SF. i don't think taking pictures in front of golden gate will EVER get old.

and here we are at woodleaf last week: here's megan, one of the girls, and I on SQUARE DANCE night! and yes, I broke my toe: MFBB....my first broken bone!

Here's Hailey, one of my favorite freshmen friends: we were obviously looking hardcore for sports uni night.

And here's Li, another favorite (okay, let's just admit it: everyone's my favorite!). But there were some pretty cool things that happened with Li this last week, and I was blessed to share life with her at Woodleaf.

Finally, here's a very special part of last week: Aisea. Aisea, who's originally from the Bay Area, was at Woodleaf as the camp musician for the month. Besides getting to connect with him personally, it was beautiful to see him take our four Tongan girls under his wings and give them a little VIP time. There's no doubt in my mind that he was to be up in Challenge, CA at our exact time partially for this very reason. I love it when that happens....

finally, just last night we celebrated the 30th birthday of an old teaching buddy and dear friend, Jenn, out on a sailboat on the bay! how I love Erika and Jenn!

just a couple of little pics.

2009-06-18T10:37:00.000-07:00

The annual sickness has come upon miss mac....ahh, for resting, whether I feel like it or not! (And while I'm at it, does anyone have any fool-proof remedies for this cold/flu-like thing that's not going away? I yearn NOT to go to the doctor. Bleh).

First, we had our last YL a couple weeks ago, beach bonfire style! Here's a shot with Annie and Li - Annie's a leader and Li's a kid. Both are rockstars and convey the excitement of the evening.

Davarian has soon become one of our favorite friends at Young Life - the other week he tried to convince a poor new leader that Lil' Wayne was his dad and that he had a pet panda bear. And that, Davarian, is why I like you! Here he is in some girl's Uggs...

Then, two weeks ago I traveled up to WA for a "south end" trip, as I like to call it, making stops in Auburn, Tacoma and Gig Harbor. Old roommate Gracie was getting married, so it was an absolute delight to be there for the festivities; Gracie's then the younger sister of Gaylynn, whom I was on work crew with waaaaay back in '96 - here's Grace, and then work crew buds Heidi, Gaylynn and me.

Congrats Gracie and Buddy (best names for a couple, EVER).

I also got to meet n greet the newest Nelson, little Henry James! congrats Amanda and Jess! He IS a little campfire...ie: quite stare-able.
Finally, I did make a quick stop in Auburn, and got to hang out with one of my favorite YL girls, Nikole. There's nothing like a walk n talk with Starby's in hand.

Finally, last weekend was my dear friend Dirk's jorts and ports party - for those of you, like me, who don't use "jorts" in your regular everyday vocabulary, it's a nice little combo for JEAN SHORTS. There you go. Anyways, first we have a pick with my long-lost friend Claudia - she's that friend that you've known for less than a year, but you feel like it's been for-evah.
And last, but certainly not least, I just want you to get an idea of my outfit for the evening: joveralls! Here I am with Erin, a friend on the Peninsula who actually hails from AUBURN of all places; we both showed up with the one-strap down joveralls. And, mind you, the beer I'm holding - it wasn't mine. I'm much more of a ports girl! :)

And now...off to the store for some flu drugs-of-choice!

does life....

2009-05-31T22:57:00.000-07:00

get more precious than this? I love my little weasel of a dog.

oh to have a funny day!

2009-05-26T22:23:00.000-07:00

Some days are just funny. Today I couldn't decide between these three moments which was the funniest:

(In order of appearance)

3.03 pm: I drop off some carwash tickets to one of our Wyldlife girls; intending the conversation to last 1.5 seconds at the door, I'm welcomed into the family home with all the Greek "hopa's!" one can muster. "Come in, come in!" Sure! I beep the alarm on Raul the Jetta. I come in, and am made to sit down, to see the house, to drink OJ, and then (and this is my favorite part), to take home a bag of food. "Do you like wine? We need to give you wine. Have you tried this kind?" She points to a Trader Joe's fave, Now and Zen - I laugh, and she takes that as a yes. 3 bottles of wine, 5 protein bars, a cranberry juice and box of crackers later, I made my way to the car. Now that's funny.

5.24 pm: Again, dropping off more carwash tickets, but this time, by walking MD, we're on our way back from Meghan's house. As we're walking by a school playground where Little League practice is going on, I hear a 'beep beep!' behind me. I turn around to see Mr. Grown Man in his business suit, with sneakers on, racing by on a RAZOR SCOOTER. The other dads throwing pitches and telling their sons to put on the "angry face!" (no joke), are saying howdy to Mr. Razor Scooter, welcoming him to practice. I just laughed. Just laughed.

Oh, 8:35ish: I go to community group every Tuesday night to be with friends who are, well, just community. I love them. A series of events ensued: first, hosts Ryan and Rachell just got a Muppets' puppet - a real, live one from New York with the little talking hand stick and everything. I want one! - so I was playing around with the Muppet. Steve, one of the other guys was looking at me saying, "shut up, shut up," because you see, I was making the Muppet talk, with both his mouth and hand. "Oh, you want to see the Muppet say shut up?" The Muppet looks at me. I look at the Muppet: "shut up! shut up!" Muppet says, bowing to Steve and the rest of the group. "No, Cara, shut up." "Shut up!! shut up!!!" (Muppet Man is getting more and more excited at this point). Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh. You want ME to shut up. Oops. So Muppet goes back onto the shelf, but upon putting it back up there, I overcompensate a bit on the stool I'm sitting on, and then it's just this slow-mo, falling, falling, falling .... and we're down. We've definitely fallen off our chair and we can't get up. Priceless.

I think I like jolly old funny days like today. I think I do. I think I do.

But which one was the funniest?

2 convos

2009-05-14T17:24:00.000-07:00

Favorite conversation with a kid today:

[Preface: L., a friend originally from the Ukraine, is a sophomore at Aragon. We've known each other through the tutoring program for the past year or so, and a couple months ago she made me a CD of her favorite Russian songs. Pretty rad.]

"So L., are you going to go to camp this summer with me or what?!"

"Well, I don't know."

"Well, why not?"

"Well," [there are apparently a lot of "wells" in this conversation], "I'm just a bit of a...mmmm...how would you say it? ...a home girl."

"huh?"

"You know, I'm like a cat that stays close to the house. A house cat. That's what I am: a home girl."

ohhhhhhhhh. I was laughing so hard at this point, though trying to laugh "with" her, and not at her. :) I always thought homegirl was more, you know, of the ghetto. And homeBODY was the type that stays at home. But hey, to each second language English learner, her own.

Next best conversation with V., a senior Chinese student:

"Life is just really hard right now."

"Why is it hard?"

"Well ... I just think there must be something more out there. Like for instance, my family doesn't practice a religion, and I don't necessarily think that there's an afterlife, that I'm going to go somewhere after I die, but what if there is? What if there is a higher being, or another place?"

My eyes were BULGING out of my head at this point. I'd never talked to this girl before today, and here she was just pouring out her heart. We talked about the end of childhood soon encroaching upon her, and how she doesn't want to have to act grown-up, even though she's supposed to, according to societal norms and her own cultural standards. We talked about not worrying about the future, and about the plans that her family has laid out for her. We talked about exploring whether there is a God or not.

It was an incredible conversation in the middle of the high school library.

I love what I do for a living.

Thank you for supporting me in this journey, friends and family, near and far.

2009-05-05T13:51:00.000-07:00

I love...

walking. everywhere. "Nothing brings home the beauty and power of the world that we live in like walking." - Julia Cameron, Walking in this World. Though I just paid off RAUL THE JETTA yesterday (woohoo!), if I could I wouldn't have a car, and Mr. Darcy and I would just walk everywhere.

I do not love...

needing to stock up on quarters to do the laundry since we don't have a washer/dryer. That and parking (!) are my two "bleh's" about living here. So, guess who's WALKING to the laundromat in a few minutes?

I have recently started loving...

GARDENING. in my auntie's yard, that is. There is something about getting your hands dirty with the good of the earth that just feels RIGHT. And weeding (though they seem to pop up as soon as you pick 'em) brings about instant gratification!

And also...SETTLERS OF CATAN! Apparently this means I might be a closet Dungeons and Dragon freak too, but it is SUCH a fun, fun game!

Need something good to support? My friend Angel is heading to Uganda this summer to study the human trafficking, sex slavery, and child soldier situations that currently exist there. Check out her website and help her raise the funds to get there!

Favorite music this week: the Ditty Bops, Dave Barnes and Ben Harper!

that's it. :)

post numero 259 - with almost as many pictures!

2009-04-23T21:59:00.000-07:00

The life in April. A recap. By Cara.

The donut olympics at Young Life: we encourage close relationships.

Our banquet was march 30th...which I suppose actually doesn't constitute an April post, but we'll let that one slide. It was rad having musician and friend Mark Wagner down for the weekend, and then my fabulous friend of a high school Young Life leader, Jeramy Williams, down to speak.

Jeannie, Mark and I at the farmer's market in SF one Saturday AM...

Jeramy bringing down the house while speaking on Monday night...SO proud of him!

And then soon thereafter a group of LOVELY LADIES went to Boulder Creek (hippie mountain town - it's fabulously eco-savvy and good to the heart) for R and R.

2 of my dear friends, Jenn and Erika decided to kidnap me for a special post-birthday belated 30th celebration (and hey, if somebody says milk it, bring on the utters!). First we went out to a fun meal in the city, New Orleans style, and ate and drank well. I forgot how much I LOVE banana's fosters! Who knew the goodness that exists in that recipe?!

Then they took me to the surprise part of the evening: GREASE, live in the theater! Of course, much to their regret perhaps, they didn't realize that I'd been in that show my freshman year of high school, so I merrily sang along to, well, everything. I swear I contained myself:

One of the coolest experiences I had this last month was being with dear friends Ryan and Rachell as they got confirmed and baptized into the Catholic church the night before easter. It is so easy to get caught up in my own "version" of Christianity (ie: the one I most identify with) that I forget that there exists another side to the picture. Holiness. Reverence. Awe. Tradition.

Then, on Easter we celebrated in the afternoon with a small group of friends:

(And indeed, I wish I could stake claim to the tart, but it was ALL Jackie. Amazing).

Then, the day after Easter I flew to YL's Lost Canyon (camping property) in northern Arizona for speaker training, in preparation for speaking this summer. It was a super positive experience, but one of the highlights was getting to see the Grand Canyon again! I'd seen it when I was 14, so when I flew into Flagstaff and got to camp 3 hours and 15 minutes before we were starting training, I was stoked to find out that the park was only an hour away. God bless those rental cars: drive an hour out there, see its beauty for an hour, drive an hour back.

Was it worth it? YES. Upon leaving, I took a wrong turn (big surprise!), and ended up coming across these wild donkey-horse-moose-deer mammals. I'm still perplexed as to what they were:

Finally, just two more pics; here's one of Annie and me. annie's one of our YL leaders, and has become a dear friend. We showed up to club both in our black work out pants and magenta tops. Great minds think alike:

Then, last weekend a group of us headed down the 1 to Butano State Park, which is right outside of the little hippie farming town of Pescadero. (I seem to have a thing for these hippie communes....hmmm). On Saturday Doug and I went on a fantastic hike up to a much proclaimed but somewhat lame abandoned air strip at the top of the mountain. I expected to see overgrown wildflowers and perhaps an Edward Cullen vampire or two hiding in the shadows, but instead the bumpy ground just prided itself in gravel and a limited view. Anyways, at first I was giving MD a drink of water via my camelbak, but that seemed to be working intermittently, so Doug invented taking his own gulp of water and then feeding it to the dog. It may look easy, but getting a steady stream is hard work. I'll give you a dollar if you succeed.

the "justs..."

2009-04-08T23:03:00.000-07:00

*just finished reading TWILIGHT. Oh Edward Cullen and Bella.

*just finished banquet a week ago :: a night in venice, you were good to the heart!

*just gave Mr. Darcy a bath today, after being told that he smells - like a dog. Bad sign.

*just gave Nordstrom Rack a little visit.

*just (finally) rolled over all of my previous 401K/retirement plans from previous employers to my current employer.

*just found out that I only have one more car payment and RAUL THE JETTA will be paid in full! My first car deed! (title...what's it called?)

*just drove down the 1 to Butano State park with MD today, at peace with jesus and the heart.

*just became addicted to Settlers of Catan - really, i think I just want to beat my friend Doug. That's about it.

*just got a Hep B finishing shot for life (wincing like a little schoolgirl), following original Thailand shots - but now I'm immune!

*just REALLY started dreaming about upcoming vacations...which is generally a sign that I need a vacation.

There you go. the "justs." And yours?

the big 3-0...

2009-03-22T17:42:00.000-07:00

Hitting the power decade (so my older, wiser friends like to say...) is officially here - and I thought turning 21 was a big deal! This weekend roommate jeannie and I did a power WEEKEND of birthday festivities, as her 29th also coincided with St. Patty's day. We started Tuesday night off going to a little dinner over in Half Moon Bay at the lovely Cafe Gibraltar:

Wednesday: dancing in the city. FABULOUS.

So then, we move onto Thursday: chicken enchilada dinner with auntie, uncle-y, friend Annie and cousin Kaitlin in Hayward. Mmm!

But Friday it really starts with the birthday-campout-pajama-party sleepover! Granted, jeannie and I were some of the only ones who wore our PJ's, but we donned them with pride:

We roasted smores, drank sangria, played the whip cream game (ie: stick a glob of whip cream on your hand, then hit your arm with the other hand, make it fly into the air and catch it with your mouth....like this:

A bunch of favorite friends came from all over the place, including the santa cruz peeps, my community group and other fabulous folks:

Some (...) of us stayed up until 6 that morning, and then it was celebration #2 of the official weekend with the pancake breakfast! (Of course, is there a classic breakfast shot? No...it's instead of Lily and I on a walk with MD when the poor buddy couldn't find a spot of grass. Poo on the pavement it is! Also, I definitely support walking around the neighborhood in your onesie).

Finally, last night we went out to Pie Ranch near Pescadero for the community HOE-DOWN! I feel like Mr. Chapin's "Elvira" linedancing in elementary school prepared me for this night, as did the annual staff event with Johnny Barber at Mission Springs (which, by the way, I must ask: is the man still kickin' the square dance groove?). This has got to be one of those moments of wholesome goodness in which it's impossible NOT to have a smile on your face. In that way, I am a big fan of all that comes with a night like this.

So, friends, one and all, thank you for welcoming me into the power decade - it's been a great 2 days so far! :)

oh the cute pups

2009-03-10T13:10:00.000-07:00

No, I did not get another dog, but this is Mr. Darcy's dear dog-friend, Mabel, daughter of Camo and Heather over in Santa Cruz. The Troxells are always SO gracious to watch MD while I'm usually on some YL overnight in the area, and last Thursday was no exception. I owe them about 5,000 Taqueria Vallartas, so thanks Camo and Heather!

current eclectic reads...

2009-03-10T10:51:00.000-07:00

The House of Mirth by Edith Wharton. I REALLY loved Ethan Frome a few years back, as per a recommendation by classics lover Holly Ann, but I'm having a hard time getting into this one. Perhaps as a bed time read, it's a bit too complicated after a long day...

A Thousand Splendid Suns by the author of The Kite Runner. You know a book is good (ie: book on tape...) when you'd rather hop in your car and hear what's going to happen with Lila and Miriam than make a call on your hands-free cell phone! Well, for me that's a good indicator... Seriously, both of these books are incredibly well-written, and though entirely different from one another, intriguing at best.

Evil and the Justice of God by NT Wright. Apparently the Hoeksemas have a grasp on my reading list [ie: see first paragraph] - besides having taken the NT Wright class in the fall, and now appreciating his thoughts within his popular/layman's books (ie: will I ever read another one of his academia? Dun dun dun...), Andrew helped teach a class at his church on this very subject and book. Though I meant to read it in time to sit studiously under Professor Hoeksema's tutelage, it didn't quite work out, but I'm enjoying chewing through it on my own.

A book on running a marathon ... and the lazy buzzard herself doesn't want to run upstairs to see what the title is called. :)

Finally, every Tuesday morning I head over to Borel Middle School to hang out with my 6th grade buddy James who thinks I'm funny. Yesssss. This morning I covertly snuck him a piece of Bubblemint gum, and we giggled for minutes in the quiet zone of the library. Though it's taken most of the semester, we just finished up Zach's Lie, and began reading through Sparrow Hawk Red this morning. Perhaps reading a book written for 11 year olds will now always be on my list as well...

footsie.

2009-03-02T23:35:00.000-08:00

PAJAMAS, that is! Jeannie and I are bracing up for roommate birthday campout/pajama/pancake party on March 20th. Yes. We ordered our very own footsie pajamas, complete with butt flaps. I am embracing 30, I am, I am.

48 hours in the life of...

2009-02-23T22:57:00.000-08:00

Saturday night of the Valentine's Day persuasion: while driving across the 92 bridge from Oakland to San Mateo, I roll down my window to give the toll booth man his well-deserved $4, say to my friend Erika, "man, something sounds weird...", and half a mile later blow out a tire on the freeway. FYI: there is not much of a shoulder, but for the width of Raul the Jetta himself. FYI: regular tow trucks are not allowed on bridges, but the Cal Trans man is! You learn something new everday. FYI: Roadside Assistance pulled through this time, and did not lose their chains while trying to rescue my poor self.

Sunday of St. Valentine's Day realization: all of my posts seem to revolve around my car. I really should either get a life or call the guys on Car Talk.

Further on that day: the prospects of leaving for a 3 day backpacking trip are tarnished by the fact that I need a new tire, that Cindy (friend who just flew in) and I haven't been grocery shopping, and also haven't figured out the best place to go.

Monday morning, President's Day: "Cindy, where should we hardcore ladies go backpacking?" "Anywhere with sunshine!" Agreed! I mean, how hard can it be to find sunshine in the great sunshine-y state of California?

HARD.

Having narrowed down our choices to Santa Lucia (SLO), Pinnacles, and then Big Sur, we also had the ever-sunny faraway Death Valley and Joshua Tree as back-ups. Here's then what we found out whilst already driving to our destination unknown:

Santa Lucia: flash flood warnings
Pinnacles: the ranger just laughed. Wind. Rain. Horrible. And they don't allow backpacking anyway.
Big Sur: 90% rain.
Death Valley: 100% rain.
Joshua Tree: same.

What then seemed like our best bet? Our optimistic 10% chance of no-rain in Big Sur, so there we went!

Of course the trails were all closed and/or washed out...
And though I DID remember to bring the tent packed away in the big ole backpack, I forgot the tarp. And not to be pessimistic, but having woken up to a tent sitting in 3 inches of water before, it's not necessarily the funnest* thing in America.

*sometimes I think the non-word "funnest" describes a situation perfectly.

So what then did we end up doing?

A TENT CABIN!

We still didn't have electricity.
We still slept in our sleeping bags.
Mr. Darcy still got scared "spitless" and was left shaking. Poor buddy.
We did pretty much lay in our sleeping bags all day and read; books read: The Brothers K (excellent!), and The Promise of Paradox by Quaker author Parker Palmer (also, so interesting...).
And I still am a pretty good camp cook - I must get it from my parents who trained me in their gourmet ways with omelettes while on camping trips.

Ah.

We were ready to go after 24 hours, but we did get good sleeping, resting, reading, praying, thinking and being time.

Deep breath.

That is all.

mr. cummings lives on

2009-02-23T22:52:00.000-08:00

We used to have this substitute teacher in our elementary school music class, Mr. Cummings; though we slightly made fun of the old man, we did love his accordian playing for us each and every day. Well, given my new role as substitute teacher every once in a while [although my credential is being held until I pay $1000 to take an Advanced Computer Based Technology class so that I can be legal and have a clear credential - anyone want to gift me with 1K? ...but that's another story!], i did learn how to play the accordian the other night.

I am the new Mrs. Cummings. Koo koo ka choo.

the 2 second update on miss cara

2009-02-03T22:24:00.000-08:00

A few days in the life of....

Saturday: moved into a new place with Jeannie and Liliana...I also in-between gave a seminar to YL student staff about time management - and laughed at myself in the midst of it. I think the biggest thing I realized was that I may be good about planning out those planned events schedule-wise, but I must learn to plan for the unexpected. Does that make sense?

Sunday and Monday: finished coursework for the recent Fuller intensive course, Systematic Theology III (ie: about the Spirit, the Church and the End Times :: super fascinating!)

Monday: Young Life that night...truly, I am loving ministry right now. I am encouraged by ministry right now, with kids, with adults with the area as a whole. There is still a list the size of Mt. Rushmore that we can and must be praying for, but I am sitting in a sea of contentment.

Tuesday: that's today. I have started training for a little thing that involves 26.2 miles...I hesitate to actually say it outloud because then it becomes real. Then I truly have to commit.

Wednesday: that's in about 1 hour and 37 minutes. I drive up to OR for a quick up and back to pick up my beloved Mr. Darcy! how I miss the little bugger!

Friday-Sunday: I speak at Mission Springs' Mother-Daughter Retreat...this is a new one. I've never had an audience of all women before...I am still piecing together all that will eventually spew out of my mouth.

Here then are a couple of pictures from camp last weekend....

We took a group of 20 from Mid-Peninsula...here's some of our group before club. EXCITEMENT!

This is my new dear friend and leader, Annie - she's GREAT.

Joey did my hair! I think it's rather Suess-like.

Lia is a senior at Aragon; it's really cool to see the "in" that's happened with the Tongan population specifically at AHS. she's a big part of that (though she hates having her picture taken, as evidenced here).

adventures in a target hat

2009-01-19T12:53:00.000-08:00

Upon looking through most of my winter pics thus far, there was one overwhelming similarity: the new Target hat. I bought it so that I could have a hat to drive through the cold in on my way up to Oregon (which, if you remember, did come in handy while standing on the side of the road flagging down a new friend with a cell phone, installing chains twice, etc...). So I equate this hat and slightly cheesy post to a new CD: you just can't stop playing that music upon first getting it. The same goes with the hat, so 'ere we go:

Me and Mr. Darcy, while getting trees with the fam over Christmas...puppy, I miss you! (He's up in OR for the month while I'm homeless; we shall be reunited on February 4th...not that I'm counting down or anything).

On that same tree trip, we decided to show our Oregon roots and be tree huggers: Aleah, me, Melissa.

An adventure with Raymond in Victoria:

A home-made cooking masterpiece with Brandon: pizzocheri!

Lizzy and I each took a Fuller class in CO the second week of January...so far the hat's been from California to Oregon to Washington to Canada and now to Colorado; oh little hat, what a filled life you've had in such a short amount of time!

if you pray...

2009-01-06T10:13:00.000-08:00

Then keep reading, and keep this month's Mid-Peninsula Young Life prayers in your prayers!

(This came from me to our prayer peeps locally...)

*Housing for me! I have temporary housing through January, but am looking/desiring a permanent place.

*With the above, prayer for wise financial decisions with housing; it's hard finding roommates, but it's expensive living independently in this area. So whatever that "next step" is starting 2/1, I ask for wisdom and guidance and permanency as well! Is that trite? I think not.

*MALE LEADERS for high school YL

*Kids to sign up for Winter Woodleaf, both at the HS and MS level - it's cool to think/realize that kids are going to hear the gospel for the first time!

*Male leaders for the HS weekend that can then stay with the ministry!

*Now that some of the (HS) leaders are clear for going to the school to do contact work, that they WOULD get out there and meet kids! Might THIS be the crux of our ministry!

*Continued health and healing for Candy Cotton.

*Prayer for the upcoming CIOPPINO NIGHT, 3/30!

*Prayer for our Cioppino Night speaker, Jeramy Williams

*That table hosts would say YES to hosting!

*That we would be expectation-less with donors, but would desire community and their own spiritual growth and development.

*That a team of parents and leaders would be raised up to reach CROCKER MIDDLE SCHOOL in the fall! We had a GREAT interception of folks and ideas at the open house, and I pray for more contact!

*That we would LOVE and care for our leaders well.

That's it. Thanks friends....blessings, c.

how old am i again?

2009-01-04T14:32:00.000-08:00

I seem to think that I have the body of a 15 year old - and not in an awkward pimply freshman sort of way, but more so in that with moving, I believe I'll be able to lift hoards of boxes and heavy objects with ease and not be affected. By the end of moving time, I also started getting this spring in my step, reminiscent of the work crew days, where we'd move a crate full of bananas, and then sprint on up the ramp like it was no big deal. So here I am, three days after moving feeling like the girl from 16 candles who wears a neck brace and can't really have a face to face conversation without turning my entire body towards the whole person. I'm kind of R2D2-esque, really.

So, ibuprofen, heating pads, massage therapy, you are my best friend!

And I ... am getting old.

2 christmas pics to get your red and green tastebuds rolling...

2009-01-01T22:41:00.000-08:00

I finally have a new camera! (After Thailand I decided that it was time to upgrade the ol' 2.5 megapixel. :) And Young Life Philippines needed cameras in general, so I bit the bullet and decided to wait till Christmas. Hence why there have been so few pics. Well, the few pictures continues, but here are a couple to tantalize the tastebuds...

this is my good friend Tess. Tess works for Young Life in Menlo Park and has become a good buddy this fall; among thinking that Roman Holiday is a to-die-for movie (along with all things Jane Austen), it's fun having someone in my life who's on the same page spiritually and just with wanting to invest into the life of another. So Tess, here's to you! (And please note my "mrs. claus" outfit, as dubbed by the starbucks' barista on the outside of my cup).

Is not my nephew, Jared christopher Macdonald, the cutest little bugger you ever did see? Granted, he's about to cry here, probably because the snow was starting in keizer and his little Hawaii skin isn't used to it! But we did chop down a merry ol' tree and had a great snowed-in visit back home.

thank you for not arresting me, mr copper!

2009-01-01T22:30:00.000-08:00

The scene: Jackie-friend and I arrive at the church where I office out of to unload some stuff into my office post-moving. While we drive into the parking lot, we notice the security alarm going off. Since my office is in the back and isn't connected to the rest of the system, I make the quick decision NOT to disarm the code (as I hadn't set it off), b/c hey, that might look fishy.

Dun dun dun...

as we're unloading the last of the items Jackie notes that it's good that the cops hadn't gotten there yet b/c we pretty much looked like we were stealing stuff from the church. (A bike here, a bike there...a truck full of stuff...hmmm).

**Sirens**

Oops.

Officer: "Do you work here?"

Me: "Well no, not really. I mean I office out of here."

"Ma'am, I'm going to need to see some identification."

"Okay, hold on..." (CRAP! I think I left my purse at home! I NEVER do this - I swear I always bring ID with me! But on moving day, I mean seriously, am I really going to get pulled over? just my luck...).

"Hey, would you like me to disarm the code?" (me)

"You have access to the building?"

"Yeah."

"Well then, yes. Please." I disarm the code - I mean, I guess I could have done that in the first place, but if there were REAL perpetrators, wouldn't they want to catch them?

"So ma'am, your identification?"

"Yes sir." I walk to my car, though by this point, I know I left my purse at home. I search around for it. Nope. Definitely not there. Definitely at 510 Colgate.

"Yeah, officer...I uh, seem to have left my purse at home."

"You don't have ANY identification on you? what about in your car?"

"this isn't my car."

"whose is it?"

"Our friend's. He let us borrow it to move." I think I see the guy rolling his eyes. At least he hasn't pinned me against the wall and handcuffed me.

"First name.
Last name.
Date of birth."

A pleasant fellow he is.

Long story short, apparently the code just got dinged and set off, happening at just the time we were walking in. No ID, a car that wasn't ours, an alarm that we "promise!" we didn't set off, a truck full of stuff looking like stolen items.

What a day. :)

once upon a ... 14 hour drive to ashland

2008-12-20T22:39:00.000-08:00

How do I tell this story in the most minimal way as possible? Ahh, it's a story, that's for sure.

Thursday, 12/18: cara drives with mr. darcy to ashland, OR to spend the night with old roommate/travel companion, Lola. That which is supposed to be a 6 hour drive ends up taking a little bit longer...

8.15: leave san mateo

8.20: stop by starbucks, of course

8.35: on the road again!

11ish: stop in Vacaville to find windshield wiper fluid that won't freeze under 32 degrees (courtesy of advice from smart Mr. Whitney) and to hopefully find a nice person or two who will help me install my driver's side headlight.

11.20ish: Target is of no windshield wiper fluid avail, and neither is Chevron. I take a chance on Big O Tires and make 7 new best friends whom I treat to Starbucks in exchange for help with all of the above. Main quote here: "how many men does it take to change a headlight?" ...love it. I SWEAR I didn't bat my eyelashes too much.

12ish: on the road again, though hitting Redding a bit later than expected.

2:45: forego lunch in Redding as to hit the pass more timely

3: we're less than 5 miles north of Redding and carrying chains is (already!) required. that is EARLY. I pass by showing them my sweet new chains sitting in the backseat next to MD.

3.15: it's time to put on chains! I take a deep breath, decide I probably know what I'm doing (I've had some conversations about it), and pull over to the side of the road. I disassemble my chains and attempt to put them on my front tires. I am mostly finished when the guy in the car behind me comes up and asks if I a) know what I'm doing and b) need help. He takes a look at my handy work and calls me a pro, and proceeds to help me with the tighteners. I give him a chocolate bar in return. Hey, tis the season!

3.30: mixed CDs courtesy of friends Jamelyn and Raymond are playing off and on in the background on full blast in an attempt to drown out the constant clicking of the annoying chains. Traffic is not going more than 30-35 MPH.

...still in chains...

4.45: I look ahead of me and realize that I am about to run over what looks like a semi's set of chains. I run over the chains. Immediately I hear a crazy additional clicking on my driver's side chains. I pull over to the side of the road and see that one of the links has come undone. Well, what to do but continue driving? So I do.

4.55ish: all of the sudden: KSDFOUISDGHLEKRJL@K$*@$KJDFLKSDF. My driver's side chains fly off. Dang Gina. I call Dad and ask for his advice: "well, driving with only one tire chained up defeats the purpose. You'd better get another set of chains!" I decide to go to the next chain-place I can find and remedy the problem.

5.15ish: I think I am getting close to new chains because we are, afterall, in the middle of a crazy snowstorm in the middle of nowhere. Nope. ASKFLJ@#(*ASJDFLKASJ@#$@#$!!! Chains on the passenger's side of the car fly off, as a result of hitting the semi's chains too?

5.16: I pull over to the side of the road. What the HELL am I supposed to do right now when my chains are splayed all over the road? I am chainless. I will call Emergency Roadside and have them either tow me into town or bring me new chains. I pick up my phone to call. Nope. The phone is beeping that it's dying a fast cell phone death. If I call now on the phone it'll die in the middle of it. Must find a new cell phone (and a charger, for that matter).

5.17: with my beanie, gloves and uggs on, I put the flashers on and step outside of the car. The wind is crazy. Snow is flurrying madly. And I am on the side of the road trying to see with my arms waving in the air. A moving truck comes up upon me, and like they do in the movies, I am waving, waving, waving him down. He doesn't stop. Whatever happened to the goodness in society? Oh wait, now he is stopping, though a football field ahead of me.

5.18: I start running towards the moving truck while he starts backing up towards me. Hope I don't get run over.

5.19: Mr. Moving Truck man and I meet. I explain the situation and ask if I can borrow his cell phone. "Sure, hop in." I hesitate for a second...Mama said not to get into cars of strangers. What if he takes me to Mexico? Too late. I'm in and we're backing up torwards Raul the Jetta.

5.20: I get out to find the number, sitting in my own car (safety first!) dialing. Thus begins the conversation with ER Roadside:

"Are you okay? Do you need immediate assistance or medical help?"

"Well, yes...no...I mean, I'm on the side of I-5 in a snowstorm, by myself and my chains popped off. I mean, what do you think?"

"Ma'am, where are you?"

"I'm on the side of I-5 heading northbound."

"Ma'am, where are you, more specifically?"

"I'm on the side of I-5 heading northbound between Redding and Yreka."

"Ma'am, I'm going to need a bit more information than that. Do you see any signs or signposts indicating where you are?"

"Ma'am," (now I'm inserting the 'ma'am'), "I'm in the middle of a snowstorm. I can't see anything. There is nothing but snow in front of me." (Cara is getting frustrated and wants to cry now)

"Okay, we want to help you, but I need to know where you're at."

"Don't you think I'd tell you where I was at if I knew where I was at?"

Silence.

Cara remembers: GPS device. I look at my GPS and see that I'm exactly 47 miles from Ashland; Ashland is exit 14 over Oregon, so it's 14 miles into the state. 47 - 14 is 33.

"Ma'am, I'm exactly 33 miles from the California/Oregon border. Does that help you?"

Calculating, calculating...

"Oh, you're outside of ______________" (can't remember).

"Sure."

"Okay, we'll send a tow truck to you as soon as we can."

"Thank you."

I give the guy back his cell phone, he departs.

Roadside calls my near-dead cell phone and the automated voice picks up: "Emergency Roadside Assistance ... will be to you ... in approximately ... 1 hour." 1 hour?! I could get eaten alive in 1 hour!

With the engine running, a book on tape playing (which I now need to listen to over again), a near-dead cell phone, a dog who hates me and doesn't understand why we can't play in the snow, I sit in my car. And sit. And sit.

6 pm...
6.15...

6.30: emergency roadside calls: "If your emergency roadside assistance has arrived, please press 1...if your emergency roadside assistance has not arrived, please press 2." 2!!! "If you need to be connected with your emergency roadside provider, please press 1." 1!!!

Tow truck company answers:

"Hello!!!! I'm on the side of the road. Where are you?" (Distress, distress, phone beeping "death" in my ear)

"We just got onto I-5 and our chains popped off! We're trying to fix our truck, but we'll be to you as soon as we-"

Phone dies.

this is it. I really am dead now. I guess I can eat Mr. Darcy's dog food and stay alive for a little bit. Ewww. I really don't want to eat puppy chow.

6.40.

6.45: bright lights are behind me. Jesus? Sirens come on. I've never been this happy to see a police officer in my life. I jump out of the car in glee.

"IT'S OKAY MA'AM. JUST STAY IN YOUR VEHICLE."

Oh yeah. Forgot about that part. Hwy patrol man comes up to me:

"Are you okay? I see you've been here for awhile."

Wait a minute...I look at him quizzically. He KNOWS I've been here for the past who-knows-how-long and hasn't come over to assist me?

Officer reads the look on the face of she who can't hide her emotions.

"No, I saw you from the other side of the freeway, but I couldn't get over to you because of all the snow in the median. I had to go down to the next exit and turn around. Are you okay?"

I explain that my chains have popped off and I'm waiting for roadside to come and rescue me, but I don't know if they'll ever make it and my cell phone's dead...

"Ma'am, you do know that you're on a 10-mile stretch of the freeway in which chains are not required?"

ARE. YOU. KIDDING. ME.

So, because of the lack of hills on that minor stretch, chains aren't required. He directs me to Chevron, 7 miles north in Yreka, to get a second set of chains, as they will be required at that point.

"Will you be okay?" I nod my head yes.

7.05: Chevron gas station in Yreka. I buy chains and the tighteners. I charge my cell phone in the bathroom and call dad to let him know that I haven't died, contrary to popular belief. I call Lola, apologizing for being 3 hours late. Chevron treats me to hot chocolate. I appreciate them. I install chains a second time and the Chevron guy nods his head in approval. These chains look much more manly and stable. I cross my fingers and leave that joint.

7:30: I-5 corridor.

"Sorry ma'am. I-5 northbound is closed right now. Check back in half an hour."

Grrr.

This is crazy.

I drive on over to Super 8, thinking, maybe we can get out of the car for a bit. Me and Mr. Darcy, with my cell and charger walk into the lobby. I stand in line and raggedly smile pretty for the receptionist.

"Hi there! I-5 is closed right now. Do you think my dog and I could wait in your lobby for a few minutes and charge-"

"Ma'am, this is a commercial food zone. Dogs are not allowed. Please leave."

"Uh....could I still charge my cell phone?" She looks at me like I'm holding a Sprint PCS bomb. She has pity on me.

I sit in the car and steal internet from the Super 8.

8:15: Get cell with minor juice now, and drive over to the freeway entrance. Still closed. I wait in line with the other cars and steal internet from another hotel.

9:15: I-5 is open!!! Drive the remaining 40 miles to Ashland, with Hwy patrol leading the way at an even 32 miles an hour.

10:30: arrive at Lola's. Home sweet home.

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So, merry christmas...happy travels...be safe...and live, love, laugh about the little and big things this holiday season. god bless.